Paperback Writer
Dear Dolly,
You have no idea what the past two years have been like for me. I’ve missed you so much. So many times, I’ve wanted to pick up the phone and call you, pretend for five blissful minutes that things could be back to normal with us. You were my best friend. My hot chocolate compatriat. My fellow Beatle-lover. But it all came to an end.
Why? I still have so many questions about that. What happened between us? What spurred you calling me that September day and telling me our friendship was caput? Why would you say it was everything since we were children? What had built up in your head that told you our friendship should end? You assured me that we would be best friends "when we were 64." I believed you, Dolly. I thought we’d know one another for ou entire lives. Forever. Best Friends For Always And Forever, remember? I didn’t know ‘forever’ was only going to last 16 years.
Why have you made the decisions you have? Why did you drop out of high school? You used to be a straight A student. You wanted to do things, go places, be somebody. How will you do that now? I know that you wanted kids, but Dolly, what is so good about having a baby when you’ve just turned 18, and after you’ve dropped out of school? Not to mention that you had told me about Eric before you ever dated him, and said that he cheated on another friend of yours to date Grace, then cheated on Grace to go out with you! And this is your "terrific" husband?
I wish you and Jason had never broken up. I know, neither of you could control those circumstances, but . . . He was someone worth knowing. Worth being with. And I know you don’t believe it, but he still, even now, today, cares about you. Just like me. Yeah, I still care about you. I can’t talk to you, not unless I know something in you has changed, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care. He and I both miss you so much. I’ve seen that he does, whether you want to believe it or not.
I wish I could write a letter to you, like I used to in high school. I know I’ll never read them over the phone to you, though. And that’s why I can’t write. I know you’ll never hear about these things. I know writing to you is folly. But . . . I wish . . . I wish I’d been able to talk Lord of the Rings with you. I wish I’d been able to talk Harry Potter with you. I wish I’d been able to tell you about everything with Dan, with Melanie, with Mike, with everyone! Because I know somehow, if we’d been able tot alk like we did in high school, it would have made things so much easier. It would have helped me so much.
I miss you, Dolly. I miss you so much, and I wish that you could read this and know that.
Bye.
*~*
Kate.
–Notes–
Maybe you should mail this to her..I’m sure she’d want to hear it…you never know until you take the risk to find out. You don’t have anything to lose. If you or I hadn’t taken a risk a few months ago..we wouldn’t have resumed our friendship..and that would have sucked. Remember..some risks are worth taking. [SolarEclipse]
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I agree…snail mail this to her if you have her address 🙂 good luck… [Jilliebean]
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RYN: Hey! Thank you so much for my note and for reading a few of my entries. It is always hard losing someone, I agree. I’m just sorry you picked my depressing entries to read, haha. You write really well, I agree withthe other noters as well- you should send that toDolly. It is really well written and if it is how you feel, then go for it. At least you could possibly get some answers, right?! [QueenOfDrama]
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thanx for the note…i dont know- just feel so disrespected…i hate life at the moment. this year has been really bad, im not saying this for pity..it really has. but yeah thanx! [xloserxginax]
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I loved the Secret Garden and even saw it in a play last year. The name Yorkshire Lass is because all my friends tease me about being Northern. I’m proud, because I’m a Yorkshire Lass through and through. 🙂 🙂 [Yorkshire Lass]
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Oh and I really think that you should mail this to your friend. I’m sure that whatever happened between you can be sorted by this. She just needs to know. *Hugs* [Yorkshire Lass]