Gotta Love Open Diary Drama . . . Ugh . . .

God . . .  You know, I wish people would just GROW UP, and mind their own business.  I mean, seriously.  Mike’s moved out, everyone in that little group has stuck with him for whatever their petty little reasons are, I’ve admitted my mistakes where Mike and I are concerned, yet am still thought of by at least some as thinking that I’m "infallible," and can do no wrong, and have never done wrong to anyone.  God, what bull sh*t.  I admit mistakes, and yet some people are still stupid enough to say that I think I don’t make any.

After I wrote that (still unfinished) entry about Mike when Rob and I went up to Cranford, I later received this note, written in regards to the part I have in there about Denise.

"This is a private note. Could you take that bit about Denise off of here? It’s just really personal, and she’d prefer if other’s didn’t know… Thanks."

It was sent by some diary called TheSeventhHouse.  My first thought?  Jacqui, since she pulled the whole Open Diary Phantom thing a few years back.  However, I responded with more or less, (I don’t have the exact wording because she’s been deleting the notes as she answers them,) "No offense, and I truly do mean that, but it’s my diary and I will write what I want at my discretion.  If Denise has a problem with it, then she can tell me herself instead of sending a little messenger."

This is what I get back.  "again, private note. I’m really not trying to start anything, so please agree that neither of us are to go on defensive/offensive. She did try to call, several times. This was the next best way we knew to contact you. She could try again, if that would help. Someone told you something in the confidence of a friend, and you’ve broken that trust. Diary or not, this is still a post on the internet."

To which I said, (and once I realized that she deleted the first note, I decided to save any further ones I sent,) "I’m in perfect agreement to not start anything. In all honesty, all I want is to be left alone by the group of people who claimed to be friends and have proven not to be through one way or another. Well, her trying to call explains a phone call I was told about not long ago. But as I said, if she has something to say, she can say it to me. Not have it done through a messenger.

"As for being told those things as a trusted friend, maybe that’s what I was back when those things were told to me. But I’m no friend of hers and she is no friend of mine as things stand now. Any loyalties I had to her were broken years ago.

"And I’ve had the annonymous notes appearing on my diary before with people too cowardly to say who they are. Maybe you’re not a coward, though. Who are you and what makes you think you know enough about all this to comment in her stead?"

Amazingly, she actually admits to being Jacqui in this note.  But you gotta love how she’s insisting she "hates drama with a passion," and yet is willing to so easily set the ball rolling for it, and then chase after said ball herself.  "Oy. Ok, this is Jacqui, though I don’t feel it is my place to say who brought it to my attention what you wrote about Denise. I really have no idea what went on with the two of you, nor do I think it’s any of my business. All I know is that Denise is one of my best friends, so I do feel I am in the right trying to help her. You’re proving to be a spiteful person. I didn’t know you were.  What circumstances could leave you think that you have the right to post someone’s past secrets on the internet? Especially when they still keep yours. I still don’t want to make a big deal about this. Frankly, I hate drama with a pretty big passion. So please, make an acception to the ‘it’s there and that’s it’ rule and take that one paragraph out. It would be greatly appreciated."

I wrote back with, "Well, I’m greatly surprised that you admitted your identity this time around. As far as you thinking I wasn’t a spiteful person, I have it on (I admit, shaky at best) authority that you’ve hated me for years. Not to mention that you never tried to get to know me in the first place. I’m not angry about that, that’s just how it was, and I know that I did the same. I never really tried to get to know you.

"If you hate drama so much, then accept that I’m not changing my diary, especially not for a former friend I haven’t talked to in years, and stop noting me about it. You can call it spite, but in reality, it’s that I owe no loyalties to her and feel that I have the right to post whatever I want on my own little space on the internet.

"I applaud you sticking up for her, but as I’ve said before, she wants to say something to me, then she can. You’re getting unnecessarily involved in something that doesn’t concern you, whatever your reasons may be.

"As I’ve said, you hate drama so much? Then don’t start any by insisting on noting me over something that I will not remove.

"Just reread that note again. A last thought. Considering that Denise broadcasted this stuff to me, Mike, Dan, other friends in Matawan Regional, and teachers in the high school, yet extracted promises from anyone she could that no one would do anything about it, how exactly do you call that ‘her secrets?’ Doesn’t sound very secret to me.

"As for what I said in the first note about finding out you’ve hated me for years, and never tried to get to know me, I meant to add to that, that considering those things, how can you have any idea what sort of person I am? I know already all of you have made your judgments and condemned me in one way or another. But not one of you has any idea who I truly am. So maybe you should quit assuming."

Then, I just came on after dropping Rob off at work, and I see this: "This time around? What the hell are you talking about? Whatever. You know, I could give you a list of reasons why I choose not to be friends with you, but that’s NOT what this is about. This ISN’T about you or me. This is about a friend of mine that’s been hurt too much in the past for me to just sit back and watch you twist the knife a little more. I said no drama because I knew you would immediately make this about you, and not think about what you’re doing to someone else. Why is this such a big freakin deal to you? It’s just messed up that you would write about someone else’s personal life, then refuse to stop sharing it with anyone who wants to read it. Messed up! And at least I’m making these notes private, because I have the decency to not make other people question you."

Once again, gotta love how she’s rolling the ball of drama and chasing after it herself just to try and get a rise out of me.  I did respond, one last time, and this truly will be the last time.  After that, she can go fuck herself, along with all the rest of that Goddamn group.

"If you said "no drama" because I could "turn this into being about me," then why aren’t you letting Denise speak up for herself? You’re putting your nose where it doesn’t belong

and since you admitted to not knowing what went on, you have no right to comment on it. You want no drama, then let Denise write her own messages to me. Either that, or accept the fact that this is my diary and I don’t write in it for you, for her, or for anyone else. I write in it for me, so what I post is at my disposal. You have a problem with that, then don’t read my stuff.
Frankly, I’d appreciate it if you’d grow up and stop harassing me. Surely, college preparation should be keeping you a bit busier than this.
 
I will ignore any other messages left by you. Denise wants to talk to me, she can note me from her own diary, or E-mail me, or IM me. Anything that you say in all this is pointless, because you’re not involved."

I’m done.  I’m just done.  I swear, as if Mike wasn’t bad enough, now I’ve got the little dogs in the group coming after me, yapping and biting at my heels.  They pushed me out, they made it clear, (though once again through a messenger,) that they don’t want me around, so WHAT THE HELL IS THEIR GODDAMN PROBLEM????  Why the F*CK can’t they leave me alone?  Why do they decide to try and cause all this drama if they claim to hate it so much?

I’m glad that I won’t have internet in Kansas.  That way, none of them’ll be able to contact me.