Brian *LostHeart*

I started talking to this guy named Brian last night.  I found his open diary and left a note in it.  He seems really nice, and we have quite a few things in common.  He likes the Beatles, for instance, which is always a plus, where I’m concerned.  I like talking to him.

I guess what I’m afraid of is that I’ll suggest meeting too soon for him, and he’ll get freaked out.  Because, honestly, I’d like to meet him.  He seems like someone I could get to know and become really good friends with, if not more.  Though I don’t know about that one.  I don’t want to scare him off, though, because I want to meet new people.

I don’t know.  I’m just repeating myself.  He said that he likes going to the beach to relax and escape.  I do, too.  Sometimes.  I go to Union Beach, and just stare at the waves.  Everything seems so . . . insignificant when you’re doing that.  You look out and think to yourself how small you really are in the giant scheme which is this world.

God, I’m still as boy crazy as I was in middle school and high school.  I was just thinking how nice it would be, walking down the beach with Brian.  Geez.  And I don’t even know what he looks like, either.  Appearance doesn’t matter that much to me, but I like it when a guy is good looking.  Though cute, handsome, whatever, is in the eye of the beholder.  Most people would lynch me for this, but I think Viggo Mortensen, (Aragorn,) is better looking than Orlando Bloom, (Legolas.)

I guess I like it when guys look rugged.  Though, don’t get me wrong.  Orlando Bloom is gorgeous.

One thing that struck me was one thing Brian has in the diary description part.  About how he wasn’t meant to be loved.  I don’t think anyone should think that about themselves.  It’s just that they haven’t found the right person yet.  I prefer mine.  “God missed!”

::Smiling to myself::  Whenever Dolly had a boyfriend, or some guy that I liked fell for her, I always either muttered under my breath, or thought to myself, “God missed!”  More often than not, I said it and thought it.  It became something of a joke for me, though I still wanted a guy to fall for me.  I still do.

I hope that Brian, if you’re reading this, it isn’t freaking you out or anything.  I hope it’s complimenting you, because that’s what it’s supposed to do.

I’m pretty much over my lonely streak.  I’m feeling better, anyway.  I find it odd.  It’s proven that any one of them says that they feel lonely, that feel depresed, the others fall all over themselves to ask if that person is okay, if they need a shoulder, or whatever. 

Where were all those offers when it was me?

–Notes–

Girl… I hear ya. I go to the shore too to watch the ocean a lot… and you’re right, everything seems so far off and insignificant against that ocean and sky. I’m right down the shore from you – mostly frequent pt pleasant or seaside when i’m slumming it. Good luck with Brian – hopefully this time God didn’t miss.