All Men Should Read This
Stole this from another diariest. I like it. Men, read and answer, okay?
This is another survey, but it’s different. You know all these silly “perfect man” surveys you see out there where women describe their perfect man… Well, I’m doing the opposite. I’m making a survey for men to take, and I’ll decide if they’re perfect for me or not. I’m not actually expecting anyone to take this survey, but if you do, you’ll certainly be considered.
1. What is your IQ? If you don’t know it, do you think you’re generally what most people would consider highly intelligent?
2. What color is your hair and what color are your eyes? (Note: this has no bearing whatsoever on whether or not you are perfect, I’m just curious.)
3. Are you a virgin?
4. Do you drink? How often? Do you get drunk for fun?
5. Do you smoke?
6. Do you do drugs?
7. How many children, if any, do you want?
8. What kind of music do you like?
9. Do you currently have a girlfriend?
10. If yes, are you going to tell me you’re in love with me and then not break up with her?
11. If yes, please leave now and never, ever come back. If no, continue to question 12.
12. Are you from New Jersey or are you reasonably close by?
13. Do you have any ridiculous prejudices against people from New Jersey?
14. How long do you typically wait to have sex when you’re in a relationship?
15. Are you the type who wants sex immediately, or are you a wait-for-marriage type?
16. How long do you typically wait to have sex when you’re in a relationship?
17. Are you at least 21?
18. Are you older than 29?
19. Do you have any strange sexual fetishes that I should know about?
20. Have you ever cheated on someone?
21. Do you or have you often told exaggerated versions of the truth or just plain lies when you thought you wouldn’t be caught?
22. Do you like sports? Are you obsessed with sports?
23. What is your religious affiliation?
24. Are you in school? If not, what is your job? If so, what are you studying?
25. Do you like to read? What sorts of books do you like?
26. Do you play any instruments? (If not, that’s okay.)
27. Do you have an idealized “look” or “body type” that you’re looking for in a woman? Please describe.
28. Do you particularly enjoy mud bogging, wrestling, trucks, etc?
29. Do you curse? A lot?
30. Of the following, which would describe your body type best: muscled, sturdy, chubby, fat, thin, waif-like, average? (Note: your answer to this question in no way makes you any less perfect, again, I’m just curious.)
31. How tall are you? (Another “just curious” question)
32. What is your political sway?
33. We’re going on our first date! Where are you taking me?
34. Do you like poetry?
35. If you answered these questions well, will you marry me?
I’m pretty sure there’s not room to answer all those in notes, but give it a go… Or just post the answers in your diary and leave me a note.
1. I don’t know but I’m probably average. 2. brown, hazel 3. yes 4. I have never had alcohol unless NyQuil qualifies. 5. No. 6. Only prescriptions. 7. None, maybe one or two adopted ones. When I’m old (maybe 35 or 40) enough to support children I’d consider adopting an orphan, maybe from a poor country 8. Classic rock, although I don’t listen to music often 9. No 11. Okely dokely.
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12. Not even close. 13. They’re a red state, but that’s about it. 14. Until marriage. 15. ^ see above 16. again, see above 17. I’ll be 21 in one month. 19. Umm….hehe. I don’t know if I should talk about this here. 20. No and I never would. 21. Sometimes I tell lies not for fraudulent purposes (or to hurt anyone), usually just to avoid getting in trouble. 22. Just wrestling.
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23. Roman Catholocism 24. I’m in college. 25. I like non-fiction books and I read the newspaper. 26. Guitar. 27. Kind of mediumish, but I’m not too picky, just in the general range of what’s medically considered a healthy body mass index. 28. I don’t know what mud bogging is, but I’m not really interested in cars or trucks.
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29. Not very often, usually just when something bad happens or if I’m expressing anger. 30. Thin, but I’m working on weight gaining. 31. No idea, I haven’t measured myself in years. 32. Conservative Democrat 33. Maybe going shopping would be fun, especially someplace unique like pets store or video game store. But I’m very cheap so I wouldn’t buy anything. 34. No. 35. Maybe.
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