Stepping wearily

I had a text messgae conversation with Sparkys girlfriend a couple of days ago .. she started with the ..

" if you want to know how he is better contact him at work from now on" text ..

and of course by this I understood that they had broken up..again.. so I played along for a bit and said I was sorry and that she could stay in touch if she wanted. She apologised and said sorry for all the horrible things she had said and done to me ..:-)

Then yesterday she asked if she could pop over .. I said yes .. and  I vowed to not say anything incriminating at all about anyone .. I still don’t trust her .. I may not hold a grudge but I am not stupid.

She wanted someone to vent to and although I was probably not the right person .. hey … I think she has burnt alot of bridges. I let her talk about the sad things that have been happening in her life and then I said that she was the only one that could make it different , and that telling untruths was no way to get on with people , and that getting caught in untruths made people like you less.

She sayed for about 5 hours.

She talked about her relationship with Sparky and all the things that seemed to go wrong , she asked about his childhood and compared stories he’d told her with my versions and with Allycats versions.

Then she dropped the bombshell…

According to Ian and talked about among the extended family .. behind my back .. is the fact that he thinks he did not father our youngest child.

I nearly fell off my F***en chair..

What the heck was all this .. then I backed up the truck and thought hang on this may be her way of starting trouble .. so i just said .. what ever .. that child couldn’t look any more like his grandmother. What a crock of Shite. and tried to move on.

Later in the evening my neice dropped in on her way to taupo and dropped off some stuff the boys had left at her place.  I told her of the visit and the dropped bombshell crock of shite… she went pale and said ..yes I heard that a few years ago, but couldn’t bring myself to ask or tell you about it.

My jaw dropped again and I stood in my kitchen looking at her stunned.

How ???? Why ??? What ???

It just reduces me to tears when I think how this would make the child feel .. I know in my heart that its all Bull shit .. but to hear that romour would as a child would cause all sorts of problems.

I shake my head and wonder when I was suppose to have had the time to even find anyone to father this child ..?

I was a depressed stressed overweight mother of 4.

Actually I am at a loss for words …it just makes me sick.

There were lots of other things that she said to me about Sparky and Ian.. things I just can not believe. Things that are so way out of the truth that its laughable.

Sparky is living with his Dad (Ian ) at the moment and Ian has been doing Sparkys budgeting…Sparky has got himself into $15,000 debt. in less that a year .. actually in 6 months.

He’s trying to get it all sorted so that in July he can go live in perth with his Aunty ..Ians sister. get a better job and get some good money. I hope that works for him. I really would like him to do well.

Anyway .. so much for me not taking lots of the girlfriends visit to heart .. this one really hurt.

But on a bright note ….

I pick up my VW today .. in fact.. I am in the shower now and getting dressed to leave in half an hour.

Isn’t that exciting