Another week down

 

I have had a nasty cough for over a week now , and larangitis to boot.

I dont feel sick in anyway .. just multi tasking all day long .. you know .. cough fart wet.. sheesh

Anyway .. TOH has worked a full week in his new job .. he is loving it , had a few days with a sore knee, all that standing after computer work I guess gave his knee a shock.

Friday night we ran a Christmas show with a friend of ours , if you remember TOH has an entertainment business called Starfakers and our friend is a DJ Short Term Discharge.. It was the first show that we have done in a year , and we had so much fun.. Generally we all get up, this time I did not .. I was so hot, and still coughing, I  was on curtain duty.

Got home at 3 am .. Saturday was a very quiet day , woke at 7 and could not sleep again.. so came out to potter online and in the kitchen . Maxi was due to be collected for a day at the beach with friends at 9 so after he left I lay on the couch , watched some trashy 80’s TV and napped on and off til 12.. but was still just on go slow. I got moving about 6 .. lol just in time for dinner and bed.

This morning I have again woken early and can not sleep.. but I am awake and ready to face the day .. I have a tupperware party this afternoon at 2.. Pina colada party . and other cocktails, should be fun.

I have not heard much from Wellington this week .. I guess we have both been busy. It seems to be the way. We chat online or via text like crazy .. he is here for a conference , Todd Welly and I  catch up for dinner or a drink , talk all night .. and then nothing much for a week or so.. like we have nothing to say .. haha waiting for the presure to build again.

My sister flew to Darwin and on up to Wyndham  last Thursday.. she is staying with her daughter and family.

Wyndham is the oldest and northernmost town in the Kimberley region. ( Thank you Google)

I am left in charge of her partner.. he is usually the grumpiest old man I have ever had anything to do with .. and yet when I chat on the phone to him everynight he is civil .. must be bored and missing my sister.. He is chatty and informative. I am suppose to be monitoring his health , he suffers from COPD Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (emphysema) .. I drive passed their place daily and so I check to see if curtains are open and I was given a key in case , plus to also go check the cat food , the litter box and make sure he is eating, Barb made meals for him and all he has to do is heat tham, he seems to be doing ok. But when I say I am going to pop up and water the plants or deal to the cat he says no no thats ok , I am all good .. got it sorted , I said I’d water the garden today some time and he wants a time and can I call first .. lol he can not walk from one end of the house to the other without a 25 minute breather half way , so i am possitive he is not up to anything naughty, just wanting a warning I guess..

If he had his way he would be a hermit .. he is a hoarder.. and sadly we have to watch my sister live in this mess. She is so so in need of this break. I took TOH there when we had to get the key and instructions.. he was amazed..the little path from the door to the couch , the space big enough for a coffee cup on the table, the stacks of papers from probably 2 years ago or more .. every now and then my sister cleans some of it up and moves the papers but he gets so terribly upset. mail on the table is all balanced and at odd angles and he ferrits through and can find a letter he got in March and knows what it is and where it is . The thick layer of dust on everything and the cat and dog hair can not be good for his health, but there is no space to run the vacuum.. Boxes and boxes , piles and piles.

Plastic bags full of bags , car parts for cars he owned , 7 , 8 and 10 years ago , still in the box . the car long gone. Broken chainsaws waiting repair , a lovely NEW jack and jill garden seat , assembled and in the lounge , I thought it would be lovely out on the deck , but as it was pointed out , it was needed as seating in side as the lounge suite was taken up with boxes and papers and just enough room for his bottom on the 3 seater (HONEST) and my sisters seat with the lap top beside her.. the other chair was hidden and covered , on a second visit only one of the seats on the jack and jill 2 seater was free , he’d filled it with stuff.

I watched her try to pack her suitcase.. she had a space in the sapre room that doubles as her office. where the suitcase lay at an odd angle on the floor balancing on piles of stuff.. there were clothes all over the place , like her suitcase had vomited .. I thought this was her process, but turns out this was the clean washing , just tossed . She has learnt that if there is a tidy space he will fill it , so even her space is messy. It gets her down, she is embarassed, she is worn out.

In the kitchen the grease and dust on every surface was disgusting. the bench space was non existent. Spice jars empty and never used caked in dust and greasy looking, a fallen magnet on the floor covered with dog hair and dust. I just wanted to clean.. I still might.

Egg cartons and bread bags collected and piled. Tins in the cupboards that are so so old they are rusty.. Ohh what a tragedy.

He will not let anything be thrown out , he asks all the time what are you doing where are you going , how long will you be ? do you need to buy that? Don’t throw that out I want it .. I’ll fix it , I’ll use it. 

 When they travelled a few years ago , they went overseas every year , on the way back through customs they bought Duty free wine and spirits, they bought their allocation.. but always the same , and neither of them drink it. He always made her buy Southern Comfort , but she doesn’t drink it and neither does he.. She was not to buy Jack Daniels ,, so along with what looks like approx 70 bottles of mixed red and white wines in the dust covered wine rack up the hall way there are 6 bottles of  Southern Comfort . there are probably more but I can only see half the rack as it is against the wall and there is at least 2 feet deep and as high of papers and boxes stacked against it.

What can we do , he wont let anything go , he wont let you help him , he is stubborn and angry and sick. He has not had a shower / bath in over a year. The steam stops him from breathing.  I doubt that he even washes. He does nothing but sit and watch TV, he goes to bed at 1am and wakes at 12pm.

We as a family just support her. He has a son who is abusive and rude , and a daughter that he has not seen in probably close to 30 years.

It is all horrible.

I feel so sad for him …

 

TTFN..xox