just forget today happened

I dont have much time to write as I have to leave for work soon, but i’ve jsut had 3 days off so I feel like I shoul be there anyway.  My new roster begins this week and finally i’ll be doing 38 hours every week instead of 47/29, with sundays and mondays off.  Should be good, hopefully.

Big day yesterday, one i’d rather forget actually.  Mick rang me in the morning, and it was normal conversation.  i have no problem talknig to that guy, there’s just no way I could ever get back with him even if i wasn’t with Luke.  Anyway we ended our conversation and I was getting all these love messages from him, mainly along the lines of ‘i miss you so much, im so wrapped up in you, cant stop thinking of you, i love you and always will…blah blah blah’, they went on for ages. I’m not gunna go into what they exactly were cos I don’t wanna remember them.  I sent one reply back being rather harsh saying ‘you never wanted to see me, i moved on, im with luke now’ but didnt reply to any of the others.  That guy hurt me, and the messages just hurt more – if he loved me, he sure had a fucking funny way of showing it.  I was upset and crying, i didn’t know how to handle the situation, so i sent Luke a message saying i wished he was here and i needed to talk to him and for him to hug me.  I felt scared, violated somewhat and Luke actually arrived home from work about 10 mins later, and i showed him all the messages and my one reply, and he simply said ‘don’t let me see Mick’s phone number’.  I didn’t need to ask why, Luke can rip shreds off anyone I can tell – i havent actually seen it yet, but he doesnt put up with shit, wheras I tolerate a lot of it and usually handle things in a more polite way i guess.  At least Luke gets to the point, what I like about him.

I had to go visit a friend of mine yesterday cos he was gettin pissed off I never saw him, so i did, and i guess i did kinda want to see him but not as well.  he’s one of those friends that can be really annoying if you know what i mean, but i showed up, and kindly brought him some food as he struggles with money as he’s desperate for a housemate.  That has to be the most boring thing i’ve ever done.  When i got there he was on the phone for 30 mins so i was sittng there reading the neighbourhood watch newsletter lol.  Then finally he got off the phone and talked to me for a little bit but he wasnt in the best of moods, then the phone rang again and he was still on the phone when i said i was leaving.  I was there for about 3 and a half hours i think.  I took the train there cos my car’s been playing up, but i think i fixed the problem.  i was suppose to take it to get serviced this morning but i slept in so now i’ll have to reschedule.  God i’m such a procrastinator, ah well.  I arrived home (much to my relief) and lukey was asleep.  He’d written a short note on the whiteboard which read ‘xxxxxxxx Matty is my angel.  I’m so proud of you darlin’.  All I need is you……..:) ‘

on that note i’m gettin ready for work.  half day today!  woohoo! love you all and take care!

-Matt