Baked

i went to Repco yesterday to try and get car parts.  They were very helpful but there are so many different sizes and whatnot, even for just spark plugs and leads!  I’m gunna have to bring in my old ones – grr so annoying.  I got a phone call whilst I was there, from Sean of all people.  He’s a regular customer who comes into work, usually with his boyfriend.  Anyway he was just asking me if I knew anyone who might know where to get some green from.  I laughed and said I had no idea, and he’s like ‘yeah I didn’t think you would.’  haha random.  So anyway I told him I was near his place and he was like ‘awesome!  Come over for a wine!’

So I did that.  Wasn’t far at all, in a street up across from my work, in a dodgy-as place – it was like a shoebox with the bed, kitchen and sofa all in the one room.  Only seperate part was a gross bathroom.  Still, a home.  He offered me a cookie.

I knew it was a hash cookie, and I had half.  I then had the other half.

Fast forward however long it was to kick in, and I’m absolutely paraLETic.  My mind was going all over the place, I was worried the effect this was having on me and I was rather scared.  I knew however that I have felt this feeling in the past.  Tim’s friend’s place when he gave us these ‘herbal pills’ he ‘found legally in New Zealand’ – yeah right!  At least I guess now I know, this is what pot does to me. 

I am definitely not a drug person.  I’ve never smoked or injected anything in my life, and yet here I was, having just eaten a hash cookie.  It didn’t help when I asked how much hash was actually in there and Sean told me most of it.  My mind went insane ‘great, I’m gunna die from a cookie’ ‘Oooo I feel sick’ etc.  I always thought Ecstacy was the psychological drug?  Pot is as well?  I don’t think I’ve ever tried E, but I assume it’s nothing like pot is.  All I wanted to do was pass out, go to sleep, focus on something.  Sean told me how to handle it – if I go with it and just let the feeling take me places that it could be a real buzz.  No harm in trying right?  I thought happy thoughts, as real as I could in my mind, and for a while there I actually felt like one of those ‘waving hand all over the place-hippies’.  I felt sparks, rainbow colours, sunshine – all that happy stuff and it just kept going.  I only wish I had the coordination to actually record myself whilst I was on this shit.  I think I actually thought ‘how cool would this be to watch myself back on OD doing this’, when in reality I probably just looked like a fucked up mule or something glued to the sofa bed.  It definitely wasn’t all happy thoughts though – I worried too much.  Even now that I’ve slept and am home, I can still feel the effects as I write this entry.  My landlord was home and told me it can remain in my system for weeks, even though I feel I’m well on my way to coming down off of it now.  I know I’m writing this entry, but I don’t as well?  Fuck, it completely wipes you hey?  I can see why they call it being ‘baked’.  That’s pretty much what it did to me, although thankfully at least now I feel out of it, but at least I can do stuff.  Yesterday, I felt paraylsed.  Today, i just feel like I wanna sleep, be lazy.  Do nothing.  I kinda just wanna get back to normal!  I didn’t particularly wanna waste my days off work off my chops.  And how am I meant to go and get my car parts now?  I mean I guess I could but I feel SO LAZY.  

How do druggos do it?  Do they mix pot with Eccy to get a balance?  Haha I clearly have no idea.  Half the shit I was saying to Sean last night I could hear myself saying, but I remember thinking ‘what the fuck Matt?  That makes no sense’  I am clearly hopeless at taking drugs.  It’s like I just turn into, I dunno, someone who hasn’t learned how to speak yet? 

I’m clearly still having effects now, although I’m glad to be in my own bed now, out of that stuffy room full of the passive effects of cigarette smoke and whatnot.  I met his ex-boyfriend who came over for a while.  I slept for most of it.  I’m pretty sure they didn’t try anything.  I was under the covers.  My pants were undone when I woke up, but I’m pretty sure I did that myself in my euphoric state, or whatever the fuck that was.

Sean dropped me off on his way to work this morning.  Hugged him goodbye – he said I’ll have to come over for a drink sometime.  That I can handle.  Not wine on top of a hash cookie.  How he had five of em I dunno.

I’m hoping after a shower and another sleep that I might feel a little more back to myself.  I hope.  I think I liked myself more. 

Sorry guys, coming-down-entry 101.

The only reason this is going here is because it’s my diary – if you’re that bored, watch it but here’s a ‘get fucked’ warning if you don’t like it 😛
I am actually singing along for the most part, not that you can tell

I’m out