Lesson Learned

Well, Saturday was the lovely banquet for my company. I had a great dress. I’ll have pictures later. But, I learned a valuable lesson at the party: I can get drunk on 3 glasses of Pinot Noir wine. Yup. That’s all it took. OK, the first glass was on an empty stomach. The second glass was with appetizers (2 crab rangoon and one egg quishe thing). There was no bread to be had. I drank an entire glass of water with those two glasses of wine though. Then, dinner was served and I was out of wine and water. Nathan ever so sweetly offered me HIS glass of pinot noir since he’d be driving home. So, with dinner I had a third glass. Yeah. Not my brightest decision. I don’t know if I was DRUNK, but I was on that edge of "not appropriate for an office event." However, a couple of my friends have sent me emails stating that they didn’t notice me tilting or walking funny or being any more clumsy than normal, so I pulled it off really well.

Dinner was a lovely spinach salad (with figs) and a simple oil dressing. Followed by the main course of a REALLY good cut of beef. I think it might have been a tenderloin, but I didn’t ask. It was cooked medium-rare and served with chived mashed potatoes (which tasted like they were instant). After I was done eating (didn’t finish the beef, too big of a portion for me), I went to the restroom where the world started spinning in a not so great way. I came back and dessert was some sort of icecream layer cake. I decided to not eat that. If I know one thing, if I’m feeling tipsy, I DO NOT add dairy to the mix in my tummy.

After the awards were handed out (by which point the wine had really kicked in and I was having trouble focusing at all), Nathan and I went home. We walked arm-in-arm to the coat room and then left. I met one of the drafters (the guys I share an office with) in the foyer and he almost died laughing at me because HE could tell I was – well – drunk.

I managed to get home and into bed without getting sick. At about 10:30PM, Nathan came up and said bosslady had texted me wondering where I was because she wanted to say hello and see my dress. He asked if I wanted to respond, and I said No. There’s no way in hell I was going to text the owner of the company with that much alcohol in my system. I woke up again at about 1:45 AM undecided if I was going to vomit or have the other bathroom nightmare occur. Thankfully (??) I didn’t throw up. But, I was awake for about an hour. I went downstairs and flipped channels for a bit. Then, the world started spinning really bad, so in my idiot state, I went to sleep on the bathroom floor wrapped in my snuggie and another blanket with a pillow from the couch. Nothing happened, but I wanted to be close just in case. I had heartburn so bad that my throat today is completely raw.

The mixture of my unfortunate digestive system, too much wine and too much red drink made for a really long night. I don’t think I’ll be doing that again – ever. From now on, one drink is my limit. I never was much of a drinker. I just don’t get WHY people would do that to themselves ON PURPOSE. I was not relaxed. I was paranoid that I was making a fool of myself at an office function. I did not enjoy the world spinning on the wrong axis at all either. That’s a HORRIBLE feeling. I felt like I had just gotten off of the tilt-a-whirl at an amusement park ALL NIGHT LONG.

And then today, the boys and I are at my mom’s for some sledding. I don’t really have a hangover, I just still feel nauseus. So, she tells me to eat some of the bacon on the counter. It’s cold. It’s greasy. But I eat it because she told me it would make me feel better. And you know what? It did. How messed up is THAT? Later on, my mom told me that it would either settle my stomach a little or make me throw up. Either way, I’d probably feel better in the long run. Gee thanks, Mom.