Letting the chase go longer

Maybe its because its been a REALLY long time since I met someone in person, and not via the internet that I am so thrown off by what’s going on in my life with E

For the longest time, since I am pretty sure I met my ex-husband going on over 10 years ago, I have met people from online.  Its pretty clear their intentions when you meet them that way because when you’re on a singles or dating site, its pretty clear that you’re there for meeting someone

When I met E, we were both in the cafeteria on break getting breakfast.  I noticed him immediately because he looks like an older version of the rapper Common.  He told me later that some of the construction workers had pointed me out to him and he made some off color comments.  Later when he was in front of me in line and I stepped out of my normal box and commented on his breakfast, those same coworkers gave him a look and he just shrugged and laughed

Now they see us every break and he is usually late going back down to work because we’re deep in conversation…usually him making some sort of comment to make me blush or laugh.  Now when break is over, the rest of the crew gets up and yells his name and that cracks us both up

We sit and talk during the lunch hour and its been so nice to just sit outside and get to know one another.  He’s just started getting into my personal space more, he played with my hair for a while as we sat talking yesterday and thinking about it gives me goose bumps

This whole situation is so new and refreshing to me.  This courting, this getting to know one another, its like a dance and its one that I almost forgot how to perform.

Totally second guessing myself as I have a tendency to do, and all in my head about things, I kind of freaked out the other day, for no reason, however, I still feel like I have some work to do about my own confidence.

He’s already attracted to me, that isn’t in question at all.  So why would I worry about things like will he still be attracted to me once we’re intimate?

He came up to get me last night, which is a first for us, as normally we only see other other twice a day and then talk a bit in the evenings.  He walked me to my car and then I drove him to where his truck was parked.  We sat in the car and talked and he mentioned he wasn’t feeling well and should probably get going.

This was the moment of the first kiss…and it was definitely worth the wait

I sit here with my eyes closed and relive that moment, and I shudder.  This is better than anything I have experienced in a long time…its definitely been worth the wait.

We say our goodbyes and as I drove home, I couldn’t stop thinking about him and how much I wanted to be that woman that he came home to, to be close to him and continue on this amazing path we’re on

This morning, as I am getting ready to leave for work, I hear my phone ring, and its him.  He called to let me know that he still wasn’t feeling well, and that he wanted to make sure I didn’t go looking for him.  And he wanted to hear my voice

He said that he really liked me and sure it would be easy for him to just grab me and have sex with me, but he didn’t want to rush it because this is something that he wants to see through in the right way, and I told him that I agree with him completely.  I am so enjoying the anticipation of seeing him, of enjoying being close to him, just the whole process

So I won’t be seeing him today, and that will be weird because right now, I should be in the cafeteria on break.  I am planning on coming to work tomorrow to have lunch with him and I told him that I didn’t think I could go 3 days without seeing him, and we laughed about that…going from seeing me 4 times to nothing is a shock to the system

So yeah, letting this chase go longer feels really, really good.  I hope it continues on this amazing path for a long time

Hello 2009!