Quick visit

Woke up. My head spun up, and now I’m here: taking a bath and reading a diary written by the girl I was 6,7,8,9 years ago. I had to stop before I got to the meat of my affair with Matthew. I’m a romantic, and it will almost certainly fuck with me to read about it (you can though, have at it). I stopped instead at the aftermath of pain and therapy and general misery that followed.

What I enjoy most about this site is the ability to Re-connect with my past selves, and with the aspects of myself that have really been forgotten.

I still go to massive amounts of therapy. This year I have managed to quit Prozac as well as the un-prescribed medications and substances that I’ve been using to manage my life. This has definitely contributed to my inability to stay asleep. Also my age has I’m sure. Still it feels good to take the “real” (unsurpressed) version of me out for a spin. I think the biggest observation that has come back to me from multiple sources is that I am suddenly much more opinionated (and much less political about it). It feels wonderful, although I still need to play the game at work.

I’ve got to get out of here now, and try like hell to get some real sleep before morning. Sweet dreams, internet strangers.