6 more weeks

6 more weeks until I move back into college. 5 more until I’m done working for the summer.

The job is going well. Apparently I’m the best intern they’ve had. Maybe they’re just being nice *shrug*.

My home life has sucked balls. I brought up the fact that "I’m thinking about joining the army" to my parents finally. They totally freaked on me! Both of them started yelling and screaming saying shit. And its like…how do you expect me to talk to you? This is why I don’t come to you for anything and talk to you about anything. But then my dad calmed down and actually talked to me. My mom of course was still yelling and interjecting things that had nothing to do with the topic. We’re talking about me joining the army and she starts talking about how she doesn’t believe in moving in with someone before you’re married. Like mom…seriously shut the fuck up. I don’t care about your "expectations" of me. I will never reach them and you will never me happy.

I’m sorry I’m not your perfect little princess. I just wish she would be happy with me for once. 

But yea my home life is slowly taking a toll on me. I feel sad all the time. I could be completely happy at work, smiling all day, had a good work out at the gym, nice convo with my dad in the car…the second I step foot in my house and see her…its gone…I hate being around her. She ruins everything and I don’t know what to do anymore. I wish she would just disappear. Move to Italy or something and stay there. And, please, leave me the hell alone. 

Everything I do now, I always think of whether or not she’ll approve. I broke this fucking habit in college. I did what I wanted and didn’t give a fuck. Now that I’m home its back and I’m tired of it. I cry because I’m just so fucking miserable at home. I know it could be worse. I know I should be grateful that it isn’t worse…doesn’t mean it still doesn’t hurt. 

I’m sick and tired of her and I want her out of my life forever. I want to be able to go anywhere my career decides to take me and not have to worry about her and her stupidity and control freakness. I hate her with every fiber of my being…

Moving on to a happier topic. Daniel and I are doing well thank god. We don’t fight or argue or anything really. We have some arguments but its mostly difference of opinion/debate type things. I like the challenge. He tries to get me jealous though. And I mean like I get you’re getting but just be careful. My jealous side is a raging bitch known to say the worst things. It all fun and games until I say something horrible and yea.

But yea we’re good. 

I’ve started reading the 50 Shades of Grey trilogy, I’m currently on the 3rd book and oh. my.god. Its amazing. I fell in love with it. The amazing sex, the adorable romance, the dynamic character that is *swoon* Mr. Christian Grey. 

It’s incredibly good. Is anyone else out there reading it?

*Sandra*

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