July 5, 2010

1: A Letter to My Oldest Friend

So I’m coming in on this late, but I’ve seen this going around and reeeeeally like the concept so I’m going to jump on the letter train :).

Unsent Letters Project
The concept is 30 Days, 30 Letters.

Day 1 — Your oldest friend

Dear Rachel,

You’re the first person I met that I consider a good friend. I met you 19 years ago, when I moved to Palmer from Kansas. I remember being walked to my class, and we must have moved after the school year started, because everyone already had assigned seats. The girl that I was supposed to sit next to wasn’t there that day, so the teacher had me sit next to you.

I really feel like that was an act of some higher being giving their blessings to me, because I was so nervous, and you were so damned nice. I think we ended up sitting next to each other all year. You were my first true friend. You introduced me to the other girls you were friends with, and boy did you run with an awesome group of girls. Everyone was so nice. But you were the first one who truly accepted me.

I invited a bunch of kids to my first birthday in Palmer, and you were the only one who came. My parents were so worried I’d be sad about that, but I didn’t care. We had more fun, just us two, than I would have had with 20 kids there.

I spent 6 years in Palmer, and during those 6 years you were always there for me when I needed you. I made another best friend, Stephanie, but we all loved each other, and we all hung out constantly. There was never any drama with you, Rachel, and I thank you for that. You and the other girls helped me learn that you really can have a great group of friends. That it is not something of fiction. You made my first impression of the social world a good one, and I remain optimistic today because of that. A realist, yes, but I still have that little girl deep down in my heart believing that most people are inherently good.

We grew older and I moved away, but we kept in touch. You visited me in Virginia several times and I visited you in Texas. We went to the beach, and the bowling alley, and when I was old enough to drive and you visited me again, I introduced you to my new friends. I got drunk for the first time my 1st summer back in Texas. Puked my guts out from drinking Cherry Vodka and who knows what else. Every time we hung out it was as if no time had been spent apart.

Several years back, I went to visit you. I suppose I was about 18 or so? You had a guest room for me at your house, but we both slept in your bed anyway. We stayed up talking. We talked about boys and sex and that’s when I realized you had been as promiscuous as me. That’s a moment that I really remember. A moment that was impactful.

I thought (and still think) that you are amazing. Beautiful, smart, funny, and a genuinely g

ood person. You are that anomaly that no man thinks he can find. I suppose I sort of put you in that “un-human” category. That “perfect” category. And to hear that you had done some of the same stupid things I had, that you had been with more than just a couple guys, to hear that you were having trouble with your boyfriend… it made you “real” to me. It made me realize that I wasn’t completely broken. That you, with your incredible heart and generosity, such a great person, could still have faults and make mistakes.

You made me feel… normal. Like I wasn’t alone.

Thank you for that.

I saw you get married last year and you were as beautiful as ever. Your husband is a lucky man. I know we will lose touch as the years go by, seeing each other on facebook and just checking in once in a while. That’s life. But I hope you always know that you have a special place in my heart, and that you always will. I hope you know that I love you and would be there for you in a heartbeat if you needed me.

I hope you know how incredible you are, and that you never accept anything in your life that’s less than amazing 🙂 You deserve it.

Thank you for always being there.

Love,