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I think this is the 4th time I tried to write something. The other 3, I ended up deleting them and wrote something else then delete again, then this.

In one of those entry I talked about how thankful I am being alive. It was few weeks ago, a year after I got into an accident. I don’t really remember much how it happened. All I know is that I was riding a motorcycle with my friend when suddenly the chain snapped and caused us to crash somewhere, I really don’t know. I’ve been trying to remember but nothing. I only remember the time I woke up. I was in an ambulance, I vomited (which I think that woke me up). Then the man who was there asked me some questions and told me what happened. It’s crazy but at that moment I was just thankful that I woke up. He told me I was unconscious for some time, got an injury at the back of my head and told me not to worry. Right there, I did not worry. I went back to sleep because I honestly don’t like lying down in a moving car. I don’t want to feel more sick.

When we arrive in the hospital, I was asked a few questions again. What’s my name, where I was before the accident or do I remember what happened… Then I remember asking for my phone. I looked for a copy of my insurance policy, made a note with all the passwords and PIN of my accounts (which I deleted now 😂). You know, I injured my head and I don’t know. I might be gone in the next few minutes (I know it happened to some. Like my friend who passed away just few days after I got into an accident. He also got into a motorcycle accident and he was discharged from the hospital but then you know what happened next). So, I did not post about me being in the hospital or that I am already doing fine. I was just scared.

Few days after the accident, that’s when I felt scared but still thankful and then scared again. The findings/diagnosis, traumatic subarachnoid hemorrhage. While I was in the hospital I remember getting teary-eyed every time I think about my friend. I can’t post or tell people how thankful I was of being fine, while my friend who was younger than me did not get so lucky. Since then I learned to acknowledge that I could be gone in a snap. It taught me to love more and be better. In small ways, I know that accident changed me. Anyway, this is getting longer than expected.

For you who’s reading this, be thankful for today. 😊