riding an elephant

when we were about eleven years old, my cousin and i spent a whole month living at our mom’s sisters house, aunt lois. she was pretty cool for the most part. she was an architect and drew houses for a living. and for pleasure, she drew plump, luscious and sexy cartoon women. and she could create an outfit pattern that showed off your curvy parts. then she’d cut it out, sew it up and have it ready to wear just like that. she loves sensuous fabrics too.
i would become uncomfortable when she drank too much. she drank a lot and she drank often.
on one of those wonderful long afternoons at her house, my cousin looked up and me with this quizzical look on her face and asked, "what does an elephant do when he breaks a leg?"
i said i don’t know.

"suffer, fucker, suffer."
i told her that her stupid joke wasn’t funny and i wasn’t going to laugh. we traded that punch line back and forth over the years.  her mom was my aunt doris.

i’m not really suffering, but i’m not real happy about the way i’ve been feeling lately.  my oxygen saturation levels are not good.  i’m retaining fluid.  we are working on why.  the pulmonary doc has a theory that these issues are being caused by the high levels of co2 that is in my blood.  i don’t know yet if that is just part of copd or not and i have been too damned busy to add looking it up to my to-do pile.  so i’m just practising being careful and quiet till i know more.
 
i’ve scared the crap out of myself twice this week when my o2 sats were tanking because i was doing something physical.  i had packages on the front porch that fedex or ups had dropped by.  i wanted to bring them in.  good sized boxes.  not really heavy, but bulky.  i thought i could go really really slow and easy and oooch them inside the front door.  and i got all of them but one inside the house.

i thought i might pass out.  i have no idea where my o2 saturation levels were, but i know how my levels feel when they get to 60 and this was a pretty good jump past that.  i wanted to cry for a long time…… i kept talking to myself and telling myself to grab ahold of my balls and let’s see this through….. my body responds like an electric stove burner…. when i stop, my blood supply is still screaming it’s ass off for more air and there is just not enough production available.  and the need increases for a while and the supply levels in my bloodstream are depleted while they are waiting for levels to come back up.
 
i have a pretty good procedure i stick too when it happens.  part of it is self-talk to keep down any panic-crap.  the rest is just more calming gestures as well, mainly focused on my breathing…. and getting as much co2 as i can out of my lung.  i have no idea if it works, but it gives me something to do besides fret.

i have a friend who has had a really crappy year. 
actually, that would be a lot of my friends…… this one friend in particular asked me if i could make her a religious-necklace.  she told me she was catholic.  and i got an idea. 
my friend patrick is the smartest guy i know.  he is like a wikipedia.  he is also catholic and told me that normally people don’t wear rosaries as jewelry….. so i didn’t want to make a rosary anymore, but i still wanted it to resemble one.  i ordered an inexpensive crucifix and middle part before i decided not to make a rosary.  keith asked me how come i didn’t use one of his crosses.  i told him because he charged too much money for his work.  and we both laughed.

he came back to me and told me to take his cross and give it to this lady.  that good things should happen for people sometimes.  he feels good that he gets to make someone else feel good too.  i was happy to use it too.  it’s beautiful work.  and i have pictures.  heh
i found a glass cabochan and some seed beads that looked very good with the fire colors in the cross.  i just got some nice silver glass beads.  from ebay.  a great price and i had plenty.  they looked great with keith’s silver cross.
i needed two more kinds of even bigger beads to represent the stations of mary and the our-father beads.  i had just the right amounts of everything i needed. 
i am very satisfied with how it turned out. 

i put in a lobster closure in the back to make it secure.

this is a long shot…   and some close shots….

  the color separation is not getting picked up in the photos.  it real life, it’s pretty spiffy looking.  this is probably going to be one of my favorite special projects that i’ve done for someone.

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January 30, 2012

i love it betty perfect judt what i wanted thanks betty

January 30, 2012

you need to lay down when your o//2 is luw and you need lasix to get rid of the fluid do lots of blowing to help get rid of that breathe througowh your nose and blow out the mouth/.had that once and they had to put me in intensive care with a machine cover9ng my mouth drawing i it off called it a cpap machine.just rest no lifting

January 30, 2012

That’s really pretty.

January 30, 2012

That is absolutely beautiful! There’s nothing more scary than not getting enough air.

January 30, 2012

It is just beautiful! I am sure it will be a source of comfort for her. I have seen a very good friend of mine hold his cross on his necklace when he is praying or when he is stressed and it comforts him. I am glad you are her friend to give her the same kind of comfort.

January 30, 2012

I hope they get your oxygen and fluid sorted soon. ~ Hugs ~

oh that is so lovely. please do me a favor and give me your addy one more time? sigh. OD went down and i panicked big time. what would i do without my friends. i hope that a solution is found for this. i so care about you

January 31, 2012

as useal(ms) beautifull work so glad she is happy with it

January 31, 2012

Aloha… Your work is beautiful…! I have worn a gold cross… a gift from my mom… since 1978… Other than two operations… I have never removed it… It is a daily reminder for me… of the walk I have chosen… and of course… my mom… Aloha oe…

are you on facebook? please find me on facebook if you would be so kind. we need an alternative network when this one goes down. oh i do not want to lose you! oh no! i need you in my life. i really really do your friend the dog. sweetie pie

January 31, 2012

Very,very pretty!

you know i may never get my act to gether. went to the strip mall twice in 2 days and did not get into the post office once. agggh, me bad!

I’m so sorry you’re feeling so crappy:-( I had lunch with mom yesterday and she was wearing a necklace you made and it was just beautiful! I don’t get the elephant joke. I guess I’m slow. I’m going to head over to your Etsy and look for something for myself.

I’m sorry you are not feeling well. I hope whatever it is gets resolved soon. I love your work. The necklace you made for your religious friend is really beautiful. I gave you a big recommendation today in my entry.

I NEED THAT AMBER TREE OF LIFE in your etsy store! I don’t get paid until the 8th, though :(. Also, have I seen your stuff on FB, too? I swear I did last week…friend of a friend sort of thing… OMG it is beautiful….

Ok, need is a strong word…it does speak to me, but financially I can not justify it. I bookmarked your store, though…(I’d delete my previous note if I could, my exuberance is sort of embarrassing there…)

February 1, 2012

Aloha… Ryn: Every father’s worry…! But… looking back on those times… it must put a smile on your face… (you little rascal you)… Smiles/Me ke aloha…

February 1, 2012

thanks

February 2, 2012

i keep coming back to look soon it will be on me i just love it. betty

February 2, 2012

Aloha… Ryn: Floats for fishing nets…! Smiles………….

February 2, 2012

i sure w[ll made son go to mailbox today looking for it.

February 3, 2012

RYNote. I suppose seven hours is an indulgence, and cinema seats are not up to such lengthy occupation, and yes I am pleased the film is recognised; I would love it to win a few gongs or Oscars. The fictional Gorge Smiley in the last novel retired to St Agnes, just up the road! John le Carre, real name David Cornwell lives in St Buryan, close to Lands End.

February 4, 2012

Lt will go to paducah ky. here then our post office flies the mail by helicopter once a day

February 4, 2012

Aloha… Ryn: The tide pools have small fish in them… small crabs… starfish… shell fish, etc… A bit of everything small… Smiles… (splash… splash… splash)…

sorry to hear about your health. That necklace is beautiful. ~Anna

February 4, 2012

RYN: I just don’t like to be negative. I hate that feeling. I have to tell you, I don’t mind one bit. I need someone to keep my butt in check. My mother ignores most of what I do unless she is living through me. I know that sounds strange but she seems to do that. She always tells me I’m stronger than her, I have done more, and achieved more. Oh well, that’s a novel length entry all on it’s own.

February 5, 2012

Be safe, Lady. Take it easy as much as you can. maybe some indoor plants to help scrub the co2 out of the air or something? Just… well you know what a crappy day today was. Love you

February 5, 2012

I love it!!!! I am sorry your having a hard time. I hope the doctor figures it out soon.

i am glad you like that very eclectic rock collection…

February 6, 2012

I took up yogic breathing when my asthma was really bad. Not because I believe in yoga, but because it gave me something to focus on and remind myself that yes, I was still breathing. Hope you’re well.

February 6, 2012

RYN: Well, for real that people believe it. “People”, as usual, not including me.

February 6, 2012

its on my neck and so beautiful and comforting I love it just perfect and I am at peace now thanks love it Betty

February 6, 2012

RYN: Strange that it’s not coming up. I will put that info in a friends only entry.

February 7, 2012

RYN: Thank you for speaking your heart and I must hasten to reassure you that I haven’t noted you because I seem unable to expand my noting list, simply because of time constraints. I’m very sorry you thought otherwise. In fact I find your writing fresh, your anecdotes colorful and interesting,your jewelry extraordinary and what drew me to you was your interesting notes to Jamez. Please dismiss such thoughts and think of my overweight(by 40 pounds),sedentary self needing to get the heck out of my chair and exercising more. *smile* Thank you for writing, Jule. And THANKS for the Thumbs Up about my oddness!

Very nice, jule. Thanks for your note, I appreciate it. Just take care of yourself and don’t overdo it. I’m still a bit winded from all the years I smoked, and sometimes I have the same problem breathing. I have been taking hydrochlorothiazide as a diuretic since my heart attack in 2009. My problem is I sit too much, and then I get up and get dizzy. Also makes my rear end get too big!

February 9, 2012

ryn: Yes, they have me using a nebulizer. Respiratory therapist thinks I should use it twice a day, doctor says not to. The med for it is albuterol… and albuterol makes me shaky and weak so I only use it on very bad days… I also have rescue inhalers of albuterol plus I take Dulera and Singulair. Thank God they send the medication at no charge or I wouldn’t be able to get it.