when the kimchi hits the fan.. uh.. floor

Hello. I’m Kirsty.. and I’m a double dipper.

(Actually, it’s more like a triple dipper these days.)

Bloody metal chopsticks!

By the time I’ve picked up and subsequently dropped each morsel of food a dozen times (in varying proximity to my mouth.. mostly halfway between mouth and plate, giving me a really lovely kimchi (fermented, pickled cabbage, for the uninitiated) splattered design down the front of my jacket).. the morsel of food is ruined. Massacred. Squished beyong recognition. Lost its filling. Hacked in half. It has run down the curtain and joined the bleedin’ choir invisibile! It’s an ex-morsel.

When you factor in picking up the food, wedging it between the chopsticks, holding it in place en route, retrieving it from my lap and/or the floor, wedging it forcefully back in between the chopsticks, then guiding it (hands-on) into my mouth.. I’m basically eating with my fingers.

“But Mum, you said it’s rude to eat with your fingers at the dinner table!”

And thus the kimchi hits the fan..

And the front of my jacket.

And all down my jeans.

And the floor.