ramblings on rumblings

Guess which seafood phobic picked the wrong day to eat at the school cafeteria?

"Oh.. it’s fish today.. and look at those heads floating in there.

"Oh.. relief! Is this a… it can’t be! Is this a pasta salad?!!  Oh.. right. It’s eel? Oh…

"Do I want kimchi? Oh.. yes please. I’ll put a bit right here in the corner of my tray and bravely show everyone that although I can’t stomach seafood, I can at least eat the kimchi. Oh yes, I’m down with the  fermented pickled cabbage!

"With a big big drink of water, please. And yes, lots and lots of rice today please. No really, I like rice. All on its own, like this, yes."

Okay, at this point I cannot allow myself to think of chiko rolls or chunky steak pie with loads of tomato sauce all over it. (Oh God! Yes!) And definitely not to dwell on pavlova or lamingtons. (Oh yes! More!) Not even milo or trifle (Yes! Yes!) or.. dare I tease myself.. vegemite?! (Yeesssss!)

As I light my post-gastronomical-Big O cigarette, I’m wondering.. how desperate does one have to be to fake not only a gastronomical-Big O but also the cigarette following it, all to fortify oneself for today’s cafeteria’s offerings?

Now, don’t get me wrong. There are several Korean dishes that I truly do love and enjoy. But seafood and kimchi?

Not on my watch.

I want them to eat it over there, so I don’t have to eat it over here.

I want no kimchi left behind.

The kimchi stops here!

Now.. pass the tommy sauce.