Plans

Soon M will have his own bed (possibly even in his own room) and I need a plan. Things need a little revamp in my life.

Each night, I will study for the LSAT for at least thirty minutes, then write (I’m working on something, I think) for at least thirty minutes, then read my bible until I’m sleepy. I’ve been doing these odd hours of reading… especially as M is beating me up and trying to grab my nipples for two hours until he finally falls asleep. But my time can be more productive. I’ll do something stressful, followed by something emotional, and then wind down with something calm.

I will get up at the sound of the first alarm. Getting ready for the day needs to be a bit more leisurely, as well as actually getting done to the desired degree. For example: no more leaving with wet hair and no breakfast.

I will absolutely stop getting Starbucks in the morning. I don’t need it, and it isn’t even very good. I haven’t finished at least the last three drinks I’ve purchased. I was thinking about it earlier today, and I decided that I get it because I want to BE ABLE to get it… to be able to afford it and allow myself to have it. But understanding that that’s the only reason I want it, I can tell myself "no thanks." I can be ABLE to have Starbucks and still not actually HAVE it… if that makes sense.

Same kind of goes for lunch and break-time food at work. I can eat what the kids have. It’s just habit that I make those trips to the cafeteria. I will try and transition out of this by bringing interesting books to work each day, and trying to look forward to cracking those rather than eating something expensive and bad for me.

Those are enough changes for now, I suppose. But M and I have also been going down to the basement a bit more often for him to ride his trike and play basketball. Tonight I figured out what had been wrong with the treadmill and got on that. I only managed about ten minutes before I was totally over the whole thing… but hey, better than nothing. Anyway, I’d like to hang out down there at least three times each week.

A cute story: As I was jogging on the treadmill, M tried to step on and went swooshing off the back end. Obviously he was stunned, but he wasn’t hurt. Anyway, I got off to comfort him, and then got back on once he had calmed down. He looked at me all seriously and said, "Be careful, Mom." I love having a son. And two is a great age. He "gets it" all the sudden, you know?