I Want to Tell You Everything

I fight the compulsion to tell you every minute detail of my life. Seriously. I don’t think I can remember a time or a relationship where I wanted to share everything. When I was single, I wanted someone to share experiences with, but with you, I want to tell you all of my thoughts and feelings and just unload.

How overwhelming that would be on the receiving end.

I think maybe I want to know every detail of your life, too. I want to know that we really are intertwined with each other. That will never happen. Never. Never. Never. I don’t know how long it will be before I get that through my head. It will NEVER be what I want. It can’t be. I should not wait.

Even if everything changed to open up the potential, it would still not be what I want. There are too many players involved.

My heart is breaking. It has been for a couple of years now. When will I let go?