Had lunch today.

Went to lunch with a friend from church (who is part of the leadership there). We talked a bit about what he’s going through (we’re going through similar things relationally inside, don’t know how to deal with feelings) and I talked about me.

He mentioned how most christians are in the business of sin management, as opposed to allowing their sin to be exposed and searching for the root of it.

I don’t know if it was good or bad that I went to lunch with him. It definitely made me a bit on edge about the whole thing I’m going through right now (whereas this morning I woke up tired, but at peace about it).

When I talk to her during the day, I just feel…like I’m hiding. I feel scared.

I’m not her boyfriend. I’m her friend. And I feel like friendship is what even I want right now, as unfortunate as that is for my wanting for a wife. Please lead me. Tell me when (and if) we should move on.

Thank you for this friend. Amen.