[NoJoMo] 21: choose to be or not to be

Today’s NoJoMo Word: me

me, me, me!! yesterday it was I, today it’s me *hehe* Me is (I am?) brought to you by the number 618.

If you’re confused as to what NoJoMo is, click the icon above. If you’re confused as to why I have a NoJoMo Word, please read [Nojomo]1: a loss for words

This is probably going to offend some people. Disclaimer: I am of mixed race

My, my, my… there are certainly people with their panties in a bunch, aren’t there? This is mostly in reference to the “Kramer”/Michael Richards fiasco (see below video) but is also in reference to the Sigma Chi nonesense from Halloween (See Here)

Now I’m not defending Michael Richards at all. Nor am I entirely defending Sigma Chi (actually more specifically Justin H. Park, who is the one who sent out the invitation to “Halloween in the Hood” and the one who is bearing the brunt of the punishment–a 1.5 year suspension, community service, and attendence at diversity/race relations seminars). No, I’m not defending either of them. But here’s a novel idea…

Ignore it.

I honestly believe that you cannot be offended if you do not allow yourself to be offended. Being offended is a choice. Chances are the person saying/doing whatever you find offensive has one of two additudes about it (1) They’re trying to offend you if you react–score! they win! or (2) They don’t realize/ don’t personally think that it’s offensive and will probablly keep doing/saying it even if they’re made aware, either because they’ve been pushed into category 1, or they just don’t care what others think.

Kramer falls into category 1, in this instance. He was mad because his show had been disrupted, so he wanted to get to the person in as callous a manner as possible. Childish? Maybe. But if black americans did not choose to be offended by the term Nigger, he either would’ve had to find some other way to insult the man, or his insults simply would’ve been useless.

The “Halloween in the Hood” themed party arguably falls into category two. I do not personally know any of the Sigma Chi members, nor have I talked to one since the incident, but I really do doubt that there was any malicious intent meant by it. The pirate skeleton hanging from the noose was just that–a pirate. Last I checked, that was a reference to pirates of the Carribean.. Not an imagined reference to lynchings. The student dressed barefoot in overalls? Well unless he had his face and arms painted with brown paint (which he didn’t) how do you know he was trying to portray a slave? How do you know he wasn’t just dressed as a redneck/hillbillie farmer? I admit… i was not there. But I think that certain members of the Black Student Union were overreacting.

The president of the BSU, in addition to the statements in the news story linked to above, made comments on television that she’d frequently been avoided, and students would refuse to work with her, “Because I am a black female.” This comment irritated me to no end. First of all, no one can know, unless they are told explicitly, what someone’s motivations for doing something are. I wonder if it had ever occured to her that maybe the reason people wouldn’t work with her is because they find her loud and obnoxious.

I think people tend to see racism (and discrimnation in general) where it isn’t. And to me, that’s very sad, although I admit, I’ve been guilty of it too. Despite my mixed race, I look white. This in the past has made me feel self-conscious around darker-skinned people. Especially in my very small hometown that was predominantely white. It wasn’t that I was scared of them or anything (that would require being scared of half my family).. but that I worried that since they didn’t know I was mixed, if I did the tiniest little not-nice thing, would they think that I was being racist towards them??

So with all that said. Are you offended? You could choose not to be. It’s your choice.