12/4/06

I will update with answers for you soon.

Yesterday morning in the quiet that is mine as all the boys sleep I was watching a health programme.  A New Face for Marlie (I think that is what it’s called).  Very heart wrenching as all those miracle health shows generally are.  I just started crying.  Crying for all that is wrong and all that is tangled and all the helplessness I feel.  Sometimes its so hard to discern which way is up ya know?  I cried for about an hour and then David came down from his bedroom his usual warm and loving chipper morning self and gave me a huge hug and said "Good Morning Mommy".

"Good Morning Sunshine"

David is the sunshine.  I once called Jeff Sunshine when he was little and he said to me.. "I’m not the Sun Mom!  I’m the Moon!"  So to Jeff I always say.  "Good Morning Moonshine!"

Kids are so great.

I’m so tired of this mid life crisis.  How long is this stuff supposed to last anyway?  Going on 5 years I think.  Oh sure, there are good days.  Even productive days.  But most of the time I feel so lost and so misdirected.  This isn’t work I’m talking about.  Careerwise I’m having the best years of my life.  But it seems the better work goes the worse I feel personally.  The more lost I feel.

*sigh*

Travelling to Boston tomorrow for a 4 hour meeting.  So I lied about travelling again this year 😉  This is with the president of the company so I couldn’t very well say eff off.   Ya’ll keep the snow away ya hear?

Love you guys