22/08

 I’m trying to decide if to be honest about yourself is exactly what I thought.  I was pretty sure that to be honest about who you are to everyone—to tell the honest truth—to not be a fake person—you had to tell everyone everything about you.  All your faults and all your problems.  What you are afraid of.  What you are bad at.  What you hate about your life.  And I do believe those things are important, and that you shouldn’t lie about them or hide them, or pretend they are not there.  But I was totally missing the other half!  For some reason i thought that if you told the truth about what you love.  If you were honest about what makes you happy.  If you were in a good mood.  If you made a point to do the things you are good at–to show them off even—if you did any of those things– that you were fake.  That you weren’t being real–because reality is that life sucks.  Right?

No.  It isn’t right.  It isn’t.

The reality isn’t that life sucks.  The reality is that life is impartial.

It is never going to be all good.  But it most certianly is NOT all bad.  I’m not being fake if I’m happy.  I’m not a liar if I’m glad about something.  I’m not a show off if I’m good at something.  To be honest IS to be happy.  It IS to be glad.  It IS to be good at things.  Because part of life IS good.  It is.  And I didn’t realize.  I didn’t realize until right now.