Letting out this awful feeling…

Hi! I’m new to this environment. I just wanted to let out these awful feelings. I guess this is going to be a long story.

I’m a freshman and part of my college program’s organization. I ran as an assistant to the vice president of internal affairs. Unfortunately, I didn’t win. But they offered me to be one of the graphic designers. After learning that, I made the logo of my previous organization from senior high school, where I was the secretary, and have been making lots of creative projects like simple graphic design, videography, and video editing. But I guess they’ve forgotten about that, or maybe disregarded it.

So here’s the thing… This friend asked me about my reply to our organization president. Asking back, “Which reply?”. He then mentioned this Leadership Training that will be held next week at our campus. Our president messaged him, inviting him to participate in this program. I am happy for him. However, I was bitter at the same time because I didn’t receive any messages from our president. The program is a great opportunity to be one of the officers for the next year.

That’s when I confirmed that our president didn’t like my performance throughout our organization’s activities. I admit, I made a lot of mistakes during our events, but they didn’t have a major effect. I’ve been participating, anticipating, and supporting all of our organization’s activities.

I’ve been feeling a lot of dislike from our president toward me. I did my best, and I need her guidance. I am very supportive, and I let her see that. But I guess she didn’t notice everything I did for our organization.

What really saddened me is the fact that I wanted to be part of the organization, but they’re pushing me away. Leaving me behind. I feel awful. I feel worse.

Thank you for your time.

~ JAR✨