TODAY

I’ve been feeling depressed lately. Things that I wanted to happen, didn’t go as planned. Tried my best but it wasn’t enough. No matter how hard I try, no matter how many times I do it, I still don’t succeed. I’m always sitting all day, scrolling in front my laptop, only to waste time. I am lost. But I don’t want to believe that I am. People around me can’t even understand what I’m feeling. Going back and forth, still nothing. I am myself but I also don’t know who I am. Problems within the family, can’t even personally interact to my friends, all was hard. I can’t make everything work. The society is becoming more and more hard to understand. I can’t find a place for myself anymore. I don’t know what school am I going to, what dream do I really have, how can I possibly enter the world of reality if I am too weak to face it. Even crying was hard. I can’t cry even if I want to. The heavier I feel, the more my tears won’t fall. Everything is very depressing, and I am just…….lost.