WINTERBREAK YES OMG

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh…….

How refreshing it is to be done with the fall semester…

I’m sitting at my grandmas right now playing video games and chatting online. I do have many responsibilities that cannot be put of any longer, but they are all things I want to accomplish. I’ve got some stuff I need to figure out about getting my license back, and I need to find a new place to live really quick before the semester starts… but it doesn’t seem overwhelming.

I’ve been talking to some guy online who has been making me feel just… amazing. Of course it’s extremely dumb of me because he lives (…guess where…) in California, so I cant justify getting too close to him. Well, I can’t justify going balls deep into it like I did with Kyle. ..But he has brought out my creative side and has encouraged me to be happy with who I am. He’s into poetry and drawing and music and just tons of awesome stuff. He’s honestly the most smart, confident, creative, weird, and awesome person I’ve ever met. I love talking to him because he puts things in such an awesome perspective and also encourages me to explore perspectives. He writes these amazing little tidbits that explain his thoughts and where they lead him. He’s made lots of artsy stuff and makes music. He loves to hear what I think about things and see what I can make. It feels so good to be appreciated and to equally appreciate someone. We’ve stayed up a couple of nights until daylight just chatting. I like this confidence he’s giving me. And I like feeling connected to someone.

I could go on and on about it but I’m sure the picture is clearly painted by now.

A silly crush, I have. At least I realize it’s silly though. I’m just going to roll with it for now and have fun. I don’t want to put too many constraints on myself based on my past experiences with meeting guys online (cough cough) but at the same time I don’t want what I’ve learned to go in vain.

I’m hoping that this creative streak isn’t just a phase and I can keep up with my inspiration. I want to write more things down, draw more, learn more about what I’m interested in…

Fuck, I even want to start eating healthier again…

I hope break turns out to be this awesome revitalization that I keep imagining it becoming.

But I guess that’s all up to me now isn’t it.

For now, things are looking up. I feel way more motivated.