ARGGG boys are confusing

What the fuck.
 
I’ve been hanging out with this dude I met off Okcupid. He is really great and I like him too much.
Well, he might not be that great… I’m having second thoughts.
 
His Okcupid said nothing about him not wanting a relationship. So once I realized that this guy was actually pretty fucking cool and that he enjoyed my company as well, I went head first into the thing. We had a lot of fun for a week or two before we started talking about serious stuff. He mentioned he had no intention of being in a relationship any time soon with anyone and that maybe we should chill out on hanging out every day, cuddling, etc. (we had been fucking since the second or third time we hung out- which in all honesty is kind of impressive for me lol). He said he was really depressed after his last breakup and some other shit that happened last semester and that he is just now feeling happy for the first time in months. I agreed and said that I am afraid of commitment as well, and I think I subconsciously convinced him that we could keep hanging out like that and it would be okay for me. Well I think I literally said that, but I assumed that he would stop being so affectionate so I wouldn’t get lead on.
Then a week or two later I realized that we have been hanging out nonstop and he is still showing signs of affection. I avoided asking him if he was still planning on friend-zoning me because I didn’t want to hear the answer. I finally asked him what his intentions are and he said he is completely afraid of commitment still but he knows that he really enjoys my company and that he has tons of fun with me and likes me as more than a friend. He said he doesn’t want to think about the future too much and that if we called it a relationship we’d either end up not hurting each other and not talking anymore, or getting married, neither of which he is ready for.
 
Meanwhile this whole time I know he’s been seeing this other girl from Okcupid. I asked him about her and said I couldn’t handle him fucking someone else while he was sleeping with me and he agreed and said they were just friends. I started noticing other little things that I was probably reading too much into but were scary nonetheless. Once, I saw one of his family members on Facebook ask him if he was still DATING her, and I couldn’t help but think to myself “he probably hasn’t told his family a single thing about me but he has told them that he is going on dates with some girl he told me is just a friend?!” He didn’t talk to her for a week or two because she got really sick and I felt at ease finally. Then he brought her up again recently and I got nervous. Then spring break rolled around and the first day of break he visits her and she leaves a comment on his Facebook, an image that says “you’re the bee’s knees”. For some reason it ate at me until I couldn’t handle it. Probably a mixture of me having alone time to think about it for the first time, and some mood swings. I cracked and asked him about her. The main thing I was curious about was would he hang out with her and realize he liked her more than me and eventually drop me like a pound of bricks. He promised me he’d never drop me like that, but I realized he wasn’t promising that he wouldn’t end up liking her more. So I blatantly asked him “do you like her as more than a friend” his response- kinda, yeah. That sent me into psycho bitch crazy mode. I mean I knew he wasn’t my boyfriend, but I thought he liked me enough that he wanted to at least be exclusive with me. This whole time I’ve only had eyes for him, I don’t want anyone else. He fulfills all of my needs. Well, except one. I want to feel needed. And he is not giving me that. He told me he definitely cares for me but he will never be able to make me feel needed because he doesn’t let anyone feel that way….
 
But anyway, so he pretty much told me he will not be exclusive with me but he does like me and cares for me. I told him I couldn’t handle this kind of set up if he’s just going to end up hurting me. It feels like a lose-lose-lose. Either I stay with him and not have all my needs met, or we revert back a step and stop having sex or hang out less, in which case I will be very sad cause I’ll know he’s spending more time with other girl and/or fucking someone else in my absence, or I completely stop talking to him which will make me the most sad. I told him that and he said “but I don’t know the future, we could end up dating, it’s just not what I want right now; I have no intention of hurting you.”
So I have no idea if he is being completely truthful and I just set myself up to be hurt and that I should have realized he wasn’t wanting to be exclusive… or if he is being manipulative and trying to lead me on so I’ll give him sex on the reg and make him less bored. He promises he isn’t playing games and that he isn’t that kind of guy but I can’t help but think that he is subconsciously leaving me on the backburner knowing that I am not girlfriend material…
 
I already know that when we get back he’s going to convince me everything’s okay and I’m going to continue to hang out with him. Maybe I should date other people on the side too so I don’t feel like such a tard? I mean I know the most logical thing is to end it now and prevent heart break but my irrational side is telling me being alone would be worse and is holding out hope for a possible relationship (even though it seems obvious but now that it’s not going to happen).
 
I mean if you really like someone enough to date them isn’t it apparent? Wouldn’t you just drop all your silly fears of commitment and just be with them?
I don’t know what to think.