NoJoMo – 13 Addiction

I feel so drained today. I didn’t get all the sleep I was hoping for today… and I didn’t exactly sleep soundly last night. My body is crying out for the pain pills I’m no longer taking. My body is addicted. Thankfully, my mind is not.
I find it strange that I am so different… it was the same way with smoking. My body was so attached to the nicotine, but my mind just let it go one day. I decide I wanted quit smoking—too much ash on my leather seat in my car—and that was the end of it. I quit. I had cravings, but I ignored them. I didn’t use the patch or pills or group therapy. I just decided I didn’t want to smoke anymore. And now, my jaw doesn’t hurt anymore – well, not so much that I need pain killers ( I could use a Tylenol, but I don’t take Tylenol on principle… that’s a whole different entry) – so I don’t take them. My body still screams for them. I am so tired. My chest aches. My body is sore. It hurts to breath, to walk, to move. Every joint, every muscle, every nerve, calls out for just one more pill… please… just one more… you have some left… it wouldn’t hurt to just have another.
I thank God I’m not that person. I walked away from alcohol in much the same fashion. In my opinion, it is much too difficult to be “addicted” to anything. Addition takes work, dedication. I don’t have the time. I don’t’ have the energy. I’ll leave addiction to those who really need it – the pop stars who are raped by fame and glory, the soccer moms who are pressure cooked into perfection, and the unloved and forgotten, who deserve the release above all else.
 
This entry is rather short. Grant and I spent too much time choosing health benefits from his company for the coming year and now my nightly medication has kicked in. I think I’d head to sleep. Hopefully I’ll get a decent entry in tomorrow.