Lengthy

We’re in the second half of Spring and the first real sense of Summer’s heat has hit, lazy heavy sunlight, people outside just to be outside, it’s nice, I never liked Summer when I was younger, but then one day for some reason I had this distinct memory of walking out of school, during the day time, probably at lunch, and the scent of the grass drying in the intense heat, that sort of, made it all.

I watched a happy procession walking through the park last week after a wedding, all these well dressed people warmly walking and laughing, I found petals scattered into rows beneath a tree, a huge old Moreton bay fig, the petals were used to mark the aisle that the couple walked down I expect, children were playing with them, we’re always attracted to colourful and fleeting things aren’t we? We know we have to make the most of them, whilst they’re here. The Spring cherry blossoms always fall too quickly, even if I spend every day sitting near them for that brief two weeks it still feels like no time at all, barely enough for a memory.

At night the air is heavy and sweet, something about it makes me want to travel, to get in the car and drive somewhere, I know the west well so maybe north or south, find a quiet empty road in the night and follow it, windows down and music on, hand out the window, hair caught in the wind, it’s nice, in Spring the wattles come into blossom, with these beautiful vivid yellow blossoms, like little puff balls, the scent is weak, but when you get a small grove of them all coming into season at the same time it’s strong enough to smell, it’s a beautiful scent, they’re even shorter lived than cherry blossoms though.

I slept beneath an oak tree last week, in the park, it was a lovely day, I think I was a bit jealous of all the people who had signed up for the mission sleep out, with their tents and food, they were nice people. They’ve cut down some more pine trees in my little forest, I saw this beautifully cut piece of a trunk and decided I wanted it, I moved the car from outside of the park and parked as close as I could, then rolled it across the field to my car, much too heavy to carry, I could pick it up, but only just, it took a long time since it was crooked, I got a number of looks, but, that’s the way of things, plus I was basically rescuing it, what was the park going to do with it? Turn it into scrap wood? No, better I take it. I’ve cut and sand papered the two sides and I’m going out this week to get a sealant, it’s just a little bit too short to be used as a stool but that’s okay, I think it makes a nice ornament.

On my way to get the car I saw a lot of cygnets about with their fluffy little grey feathers, I talked to a lovely old man on the banks of a lake, he was feeding the cygnets whilst mother swan stood next to them in a protective stance, ready to fight off anyone that interfered, she kept eying me whilst I talked to the man, I suspect she thought I was competing for his bread. I wanted to tell her that I’ve been feeding swans in the park for decades, and that chances are I fed her grandparents when they were cygnets, but it wouldn’t have meant anything to her, and the nice old man might have found it uncomfortable so I left it. But I glared at her as I left, to show my disapproval at her thinking I was a threat, and then I wondered whether birds can actually squint their eyes? Then I wondered if she thought I was showing off, but I was back at my car by then so I forgot about whether I might’ve been a bit hard on mother swan.

It was a nice week, Eddy is actually going to see me, which is a little miracle in itself, he’s still in the honeymoon phase even after two years, happiness suits some people. James is over in America with work, his company doesn’t employ enough competent people and he has to cover for them, his new girlfriend, a Japanese girl, is living with Alex and him, I’m going over on Thursday for the day and we’re going out, she must be terribly bored and Alex can be difficult company, you need to be pretty, tolerant and you have to genuinely enjoy listening to people to like him, not just a little, he sets records for words spoken, a one man conversation, I like it, not too many else do though.

Eddy really loves her though. He met her one night in the university at a lookout spot, she was crying looking at the view and he offered her a cigarette, they talked for a while and she told him that she had to go back to Korea for good in a fortnight, and that she didn’t want to leave but had to, Eddy said he’d spend that fortnight with her, to try and make her time here as enjoyable as possible. After she left nobody heard from Eddy for weeks. I was walking through the university one day and I saw him sitting on the steps in the rain, playing his guitar, singing the blues, he’s very dramatic, which is where he had been whilst unreachable. Proper, full on, agonising heart break, so when she came back, without his knowledge and to his surprise, he basically hasn’t left her side in the nearly two years since then, which is why I say it’s a miracle seeing Eddy, he doesn’t like to be away from her.

Love is beautiful isn’t it?

Brent is now living in Amsterdam working on the novel whilst Natalie does the real work, 9-5pm, he is finding it a bit of a challenge obviously but she is determined that he’ll make something of himself, fascinating girl, there aren’t that many people you meet who genuinely challenge what your initial understanding of them is, but she has an enormous amount of depth that I didn’t see in her, although it could be because there are some people that just make excellent lovers though, not in a sexual sense I mean, not specifically, some people suit being in a relationship, it brings out the best in them, they transform, Eddy is that way too.

I called up Stephen to tell him the news about Brent writing, when it comes to Brent Stephen and I are like a pair of old parents thinking about our son and trying to give him some guidance without being too obvious about it, because he will rebel if he notices, so basically mother and father, our biggest concern has always been that there might never be a girl to come along that can handle Brent, he is, unique and difficult. Stephen has sacrificed a lot for Brent, which Brent knows and is grateful and resentful of as a result. Brent is very proud and quite frankly is used to having to rely on himself, he’s had a hard run of luck, in some ways it’s an advantage in other ways it’s a disadvantage, for instance he was too proud to go onto government welfare whilst at university, and as a result he burnt out, anyone can tell you that it’s really fucking hard to do well at university and go to work 25 hours a week. When he was told to move to the desert during high school I talked to my parents and told him that he should just come live with me, try it out at least, I thought that given enough time his father and his horrible step-mother would change their minds and ask him to come back, but he was too proud to accept the offer, so off he went to this pathetic little mining town in the middle of the desert, things worked out though, his aunt and uncle who he stayed with were moved to Fiji to work at mines there so the compa

ny paid for Brent and his cousin to go to a private school in QLD, where Brent was widely adored and thrived. He arrived in the desert during his goth phase, attention seeking of course, but he admits it so it’s fine, but that isolated him the moment he arrived, that place was hell, honestly, I just, I can’t begin to describe how angry the whole matter made me, that pathetic fucking step-mother, sending a teenager off on his own, away from his father, due to her histrionics, I’d have her head if I could. Her parents, Brent’s step-grandparents I suppose you’d call them, disowned him when he was 9 years old, they told him and the family that they wouldn’t have him in their house anymore and didn’t want anything to do with him. To a fucking 9 year old. Still, it explains the step-mother, scum gives rise to more scum after all.

I shouldn’t stop on a bitter note so, hmm, oh I know, I’ll tell you the funniest thing in the world to me, always makes me laugh, when someone is asleep, start screaming and yelling banging on the door or what have you, jumping about, in the most ridiculous, bizarre and mad manner possible, and watch their reaction. Years ago at a sleepover I woke up my very sensible friend David with a power drill in my hand spinning at top speed, whilst screaming and jumping up and down on top of him. He, never really trusted me at sleepovers after that, but god I laughed. The more deranged the sound of the screaming and yelling the better, weird noises, like, the sound a seal makes, or a possessed dog. That’s the funniest thing in the world to me.

I knew a guy who had the only car amongst his friends in highschool, at night when they were driving around they often had more passengers than seats, occasionally, whilst going around a blind corner, he would scream as though they were about to die, and everyone else would too. I liked him.