3/19/03

Hmm, coffee and grapes don’t taste good together.

So, I’ve been thinking. My Performance Appraisal is coming up here at work. I was filling out the form and I noticed all the things I have to mark as a weakness are things that are typical AS traits. Verbal communication, things of that nature. I’ve been debating on whether or not to mention AS to my boss for awhile. I’m trying to decide if I should mention it or not. I probably will if she brings up that she has any kind of problems with something like Verbal Communication. But if not maybe I should just leave well enough alone. I don’t want to screw up and have her see me as the ‘weak’ employee or something.

It’s kinda the same way with my husbands family. I don’t want to tell them and have it be a mistake. Like when I told my dad, he misunderstood it, took it to be something that a psychologist could ‘cure’. He told other people I didn’t want him to tell. The people he told started talking down to me like I’m suddenly an idiot that doesn’t know anything. Having AS doesn’t make me any less intelligent! I don’t want to screw anything up with them either. I’m respected to an extent because of how well we’re doing. I’m really meticulous with money and stuff and hubby is bad about spending it before paying the bills. 🙂 They love the way I’ve done things, even simple things like the way I’ve decorated the house that’s been in the family since 1980. It’s slowly working out and I don’t want them to see me as weak, broken or hopeless because I’ll never be a real social part of the family. I don’t really think I’ll ever grow that close to my husbands family, I simply have nothing in common with them.

More than anything I fear being treated differently. Ugh, I hate this indecision.

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So I guess today is the day we find out if we’re really going to war. Judging by what I read on CNN.com this morning about Saddam and one of his sons I’d say we’re going to war, now it’s just a matter of how soon after 8pm tonight will Bush declare war. It’s 8am now, is there anyone that can talk some sense into him in the next 12 hours? Please!