MiniMouseMum

The bad news is, is that I didn’t wake up with blue sparkly hair, the good news is that I woke up free of an extra limb like a monkey tail! In average new, I found out what the weird substance was that was all over the sharpie bag. It came from melted German colored pencils that lived in the bag with the sharpies. You learn something new everyday, and what I learned today was that colored pencils have the ability to melt. My poor German colored pencils. I realized what was causing the goo from sticking my hand in the bag and removing it to find my hand colorful, which really was pretty fun! As you all now know about my fantasy of having colorful skin.

At work yesterday I choked on a carrot and felt like a dipshit! I also found out that I was not alone in the fact that carrots give me the hiccups. And that is what I newly learned yesterday.

I woke up in a bit of a funk this morning (this may be the first time I used the term "woke up in a funk") It sounds silly! But anyway, I was kind of hating life and loathing myself, and I really just wanted to stay in bed. I wake up often feeling this way, some days its more, some days less. I was pissed with my hair, which made me want to skip out on work even more! I fiddled with my hair longer than I should have, which set me behind a little, which made me even more angry. Can’t you tell, mornings are my favorite part of the day? I am bad at mornings. We just do mesh well together. Where as night embraces me, we get along just fine. Unless I’m really tired, then I’m just a cranky bitch who wants to cry like a three year old. Other wise I’m fine!

I was busy with work, so the self loathing subsided until I was done with work. As soon as I walked out the door, I was slapped in the face with it again. I was also annoyed with the fact that I stayed late with Professor Child and his sister Blondie. Professot Child was circling me again while going on and on about Hercules….oh excuse me, Heracles.. and other Greek Mythology myths. Then when I got in my car and tried to insert the key in the ignition, it wouldn’t even work. I couldn’t turn the key my wheel was locked up, it was raining and I couldn’t roll up my windows I had left open, just nothing was happening. I wanted to cry, but then it finally started up.. I have no idea what that was about, I know nothing about mechanical stuff when it comes to cars. Its frightening me a bit because Dippty, my old Honda did that sort of shit to me and it would just turn of while driving, and lock up and not turn back on again. I would be driving down the road and all of a sudden everything would shut down Yeah, that was fun! I had the brakes stop working one time, and thank God it was in a neighborhood and not on a highway. Unfortionately I was going down a hill though and couldn’t stop. I thought for sure I was going to haul ass down the street, down a grassy hill and end up in some woods. Which really would have made me laugh, and would have made others laugh because the sight would have been entertaining.

Moving along with my sap story…I was suppose to have group today so I thought I was going to be late due to the late kids and stupid car so I hurried there, only to find out that I was going to be the only one there. Its pretty hard to have a meeting when there is no one there to meet with you. So again, I was annoyed. Cue the self loathing.

Today was just one of those days I guess. My brain didn’t feel well. I had a head ache of the non physical kind you could say. I have that a lot, so its nothing new.

Which all led up to me doing things that I shouldn’t have been doing. I let it all get the best of me, which is also nothing new.

Its something I need to work on, but perhaps I don’t want to yet. I feel really weak saying that. I have to want these things to make it work. Like the twelve steps say, it workes if you work it. Im not working it at all am I? That and I want it to just work already, with out having to put work into it. I want the magic it says that recovery won’t be. Damn, why can’t I just be a wizard, or better yet, know a wizard. Send my ass to Hogwarts please. But not to learn how to become a wizard, for a wizard to perform magic on me.

Eh, I never got into the Harry Potter thing, but maybe I should have. Wizards sound like the way to go! Maybe I should pay a visit to the Wizarding World Of Harry Potter, where the magic awaits me. Oh wait, thats Disney World. I would rather go to Disney Word anyway. That place melts my heart, and makes me want to be a princess. And the good thing is, is the the Fairy Godmother lives there, I’m sure she could help me too. "Bippity Boppity Boo" and with that, Im free of tangled yarn….and also, another good thing is, is that Repunzel lives in Disney World too, and she knows a thing or two about tangles.

Yup, Disney World. Thats the place. Does that make Walt Disney himself my higher power?

If I were to be speaking this entry out loud, someone whould for sure be telling me to shut the hell up because I am a complete nerd, and what I say is nonsense.

Which is why, I guess, I write it here instead of speaking my lame thoughts that have little to no connction to anything.

My therapist suggested I try to pick out something I can say that was good about my day. so here is my good. Two of the cd’s I bought off Amazon arrived today. It was a speed delivery, which was super for me because I have been itching for these two cd’s for a long time. And I also have something new to listen to in the car. Well semi new because one is a replacement for an older copy that broke in half. I have another cd coming, and that too is a replacement cd! I am excited to have "healthy" (yeah, I know thats not the right word) cds. The old ones had been sick for a long time, and just didn’t make it. They passed away knowing that they were truly loved. They lived a long and happy life. And may the rest in quiet pieces.

Why not just download the music I wanted you ask? Because Like keeping things old school (ha hardly) Really its because cds are easier than dealing with the process of computers (which is like foreign language to me, I only know the minimum knowledge)