box o’ vortex

Evelyn and I found two snakes in her house this evening.

I flipped!

Yeah….

Evelyn goes to open the door to let in her cat, and says "theres a snake at the door" I didn’t think she was serious. She said it was a snake or a worm, and Olive is trying to play with it. I got up to see.

It was a fucking snake. I look to my left, another fucking snake.

Two snakes the size of earth worms. I don’t give two shits what size a snake may be, any size is too big. And any snake is a devil serpent sent from hell. You may say otherwise, but I’m not having it. Nope.

Needless to say, I freaked out. I am terrified of snakes. I didn’t know what to do. I was alone with Evelyn. I had no one to turn to to rescue Evelyn and me. I slammed the door shut on poor Olive, found the first box contraption I could find, tossed it over one of the snakes, and took off out of the room like a bat out of hell…. I left Evelyn to fend for herself. I then grabbed a broom, slowly tip toed back into the den room, nudged the box a little, and took off again. I then remembered Evelyn was still in the den of doom, and made her come with me to run up the steps. Only then did I find out she had no fear at all about those snake bitches. She wanted to go back into the room despite the beasts. She wanted to watch Eloise like we had planned on doing in the first place. Before the fiasco, we had set up a blanket with her dinner on it so she could do dinner and a movie. Well that plan failed. I wouldn’t let her back into the den. No, I wanted her with me, so she could protect me. I then made a quick call to David, her dad, and left a rather pathetic message. He was with Warren at soccer practice. I said "Evelyn and I found two snakes in the den room. They were tiny and I’m sure they were harmless, but I am very terrified of snakes. I didn’t know what to do so I chucked a box over one, and the other one got away." After that lame message, I proceded to freak out more. Then I got really hot, so I took off my sweater, paced a bit, and asked Evelyn to read to me. Yes, that really happened. I wish I was joking. Haha!!!! The tables got a little turned and the seven year old was comforting the adult. Not long after, I got a phone call back from David, but he hadn’t listined to my message yet, so I had to retell the situation, and I felt really ridiculus!!! luckily David and Warren were on their way back from practice, so I didn’t have to wait too long for it all to be over with. I refused to go back into the den room until it was delt with, and I had to have David check my shoes to make sure they were snake free because my poor shoes were left near the snakes. I was still weary to walk into the room afterwards. My forehead gets red in times of stress, anger, and any other extreme emotions, so I left there all shaken up and red foreheaded. Ha!!!!!! All of that from two earth worm sized snakes. Logically I know that they wouldn’t have physically harmed Evelyn and I, but damnit, they gave me a lot of emotional damage. The snake spot will never be the same again. I will never be able to leave my shoes there without hesitation.

After leaving there, I was still in a state of distress HAHA…but I had to get gas before coming home. When I pulled up to the gas station, it was full. I was pissed. I was shouting and wondering (to myself) why the fuck everybody was at this particular gas station all at once. I had to wait several painful minutes just to have my go at the gas pump. I was not pleased. Finally I got my turn, but then found myself behind a stupid kid taking his jolly old fat fucking time inside the gas station. That also pissed me off, and it took forever for him to come out and actually start pumping gas into his ugly ass stupid pickup truck. Sure, I could have just backed out from y spot, but Damit, no! I didn’t want to do that, backing up in a tight spot in a time of distress requires too much skill. I ended up backing out anyway, but I didn’t leave without shooting the kid a nasty look all because snakes are assholes!!!!!!!!

And if the snakes wouldn’t have terrorized me, I wouldn’t have had to come home wondering where all the damn spliff was.

Damnit!!!!

Ha! I now find it comical, but it was a serious situation when it all went down.

I’m pretty sure I will not be able to live this one down. I can only guess that I will often be reminded about the time I had a near fatal heart attack over two earth worm sized snakes.

Okay, no more snake talk!

A picture of an Alpaca that lives on the pumpkin patch farm…

I think Alpaca tooth brush and toothpaste for the next time I visit the farm. This guy had some nasty teeth, and he was in need of a good brushing!

This goat and I were arguing. Then I said, "look goat, hear me out" so he did, but then he said, "now hear me out" so I did, but I still didn’t agree with what he was saying. We had to agree to disagree. I had to walk away before things got out of hand. He went his way, and I went my way, and my way was to the bunny corral. The bunnys are more laid back, and they don’t give a shit either way.

Theres my cave. Sometimes I go in there to get away for awhile.

Theres my vortex. Sometimes I go in there to get away for awhile

…please excuse my hideous farm shoe/sock combination. The purple shoes are my ‘play’ shoes.

Evelyn prefers to enter her vortex backwards.

And Warren likes the seal slide.

We are all differen’t when it comes to the vortex entrance.

The other night I had a decent sized box left over from a package. I couldn’t let it go to recycling knowing all the endless possibilites the box had. I turned it into a Scrappy box. Well…its on it way to becoming Scrappy’s box. Its not complete yet. Its not just going to be a plain old box for Scrappy to lay in, Im calling it Scrappy’s box o’ fun! So far I have poked a hole in one side and tied a string through the hole. This works in two ways. One, being a pull string of sorts for when I want to pull his ass around in the box, he can do this either while sitting in the box, or ontop of the box. He likes both. I can also just pull the string continuousy (b/c its ties in big loop stlye) through the hole while Scrappy tries to catch the string. He likes that also. Then I made two more little holes on two more side of the box. These holes act as poking obj

ects holes. Scrappy sits in the box, or under the box, and I poke a chopstick through the hole, and Scrappy tries to attack it. He was also receptive to this. I also nudged some newspaper down in the box, which is ideal for cat resting, I also added some pom pom balls and today I put some tissue paper in it. I have plans to paint the box in a cat fun fashion. Its quite an entertaining box, for both scrappy and myself.

Don’t forget to use your imagination. Thats my advice for the day.