Why bother?

I guess I’m just writing this because i’m depressed. My birthday is over in 35 minutes and today was just another shitty day. Less people remembered then last year.

My mom is in Staten Island, which ticked me off a little.

D found out last night at like 11:30 that my bday was today (because his mom and sister remembered.) Funny, he knew… but… he didn’t even give me a hug today. He made a comment this morning ‘your phone was ringing. Must be people wishing you a happy birthday, right?’ and i just said ‘ i dont know.’

I bought myself flowers… they are lovely.

I also took myself, by myself, out to dinner. It was this new place I wanted to try. Food was good.

Other then that I randomly cried all day. Becky and Danielle came over. We played Clue and Monopoly… they just left. I told Becky about my day and she apologized for forgetting my birthday and I said it was fine.

I don’t care if anyone else cares… but I wanted D to. This is my third (technically, this is my fifth) birthday in a row that has been ruined by a boyfriend. 19 & 20 by Ed, 21 by Xan, and 22 & 23 by D.

The few phone calls I did get today I didn’t bother answering. I don’t want people to pretend to care when they normally don’t any other day.

Happy fucking birthday.