Updates 1 of…

Im sorry I haven’t had any kind of motivation to update this lately… I really haven’t had motivation to do much of anything. And of course, the longer I go without updating, the more I have to ramble on about.

Okay, well the last time I wrote I was in a bad state… So I’ll continue on.

That same week I had vacation (when my car was vandalized) I was sick. Sick as a dog and continued to have the same illness for almost 5 weeks. Im finally over that. Thank god, it was awful.

We paid to have my Explorer repaired. $941. But because it was vandalism, insurance helped out. We paid the $500 detucible and insurance covered the rest. Hey, that’s almost half. Better then nothing.

Thanksgiving was ruined again this year. Let me start with Tuesday night. I had school and me and the boys went to the bar to have a couple of drinks as we often do. Well our group of seven turned into a group of three (including myself). And a couple of drinks turned into about 8. We left the bar at 12:15. It takes about 45 minutes for me to drive home. So I was on my way and made it ONE BLOCK away from my house and I got pulled over. ONE BLOCK. So he asked for my license and registration and I had them to him, trying to be sober, and he says ‘This registration’s expired’ which I played dumb to. My registration is at home in my side table drawer where it has been since last April. He asked if I knew why he pulled me over and I said no. He said I was going a little quick and it’s slippery out. I was doing 50 and it was only 40 where he had been sitting (i had seen him too). "it is?" i asked and he said yes. So he goes back to his car and I sit and wait. He comes back and comments about my old sticker on my plate and I tell him that I have the new one at home and I apologized saying I would put it on when I got home. He asked if I had been wearing my seatbelt and I said no. What was I going to do, lie? He knew. Why lie. Thankfully I got away with a $25 ticket for no seatbelt and a warning for speeding. woo hoo! Lucky me. Could have been a LOT worse.

Then, on Wednesday I planned on making cheesecakes after work to bring to the two dinners I would be going to the next day. So I called D before I left work because I was going to stop at the store on the way home. He didn’t answer so I assumed he hadn’t left work just yet. So I went home and he wasnt there. Which was strange… So I called a couple of more times and still no answer. So now I am upset because I know he went out after work with some co-workers to grab a couple of beers and I don’t care, I just would have like the respect of a phone call, or a text, or an answer to one of my phone calls. So I get changed and go to the store and go home and am making cheesecake. He comes home at 7:30ish and I totally ignore him, waiting to see if he says something like, "we went and grabbed a beer." Nope. No such luck there. So we sit in silence in the living room for well over an hour and I ask him, "Well are you going to tell me where you went?" And he’s an asshole about it. So I fucking LOSE IT and GO OFF about the whole respect thing and everything. During my anger I said something like, "I don’t even want to see you tomorrow."

Next day rolls around and we are just sitting around, talking very little. We were supposed to go to his mom’s for dinner FOR 2:00 and then my parents at 4:00-4:30ish. Yes, it was close, but it was also doable. So D takes a shower around 12:30 and then he comes down stairs. I go up and take one and when I get out at 1:15, i realize that I don’t hear the tv. So i quickly get dressed and brush my teeth and run downstairs. He’s GONE. No note, NOTHING. HE left while I was in the shower. This happening the night after our ‘respect’ talk. So I call him and tell him that it is detrimental to our relationship that he comes back and talks to me for 10 minutes or else we’re over. Cause I can’t talk to him on the phone, he doesn’t listen. He says okay. So I sit and wait. And wait. and wait. I texted Jess and say ‘Well apparently I won’t be seeing you. Have a Happy Thanksgiving.’ She texts back, ‘u 2’ or something. Then I call D again (its been well over 20 minutes. His mom lives like 3 or 4 blocks away. About a mile). I ask him where he is (now it’s 2:00) he says they’re eating. I ask him why he said he was going to come and talk to me and he said I dunno. Then asks me if Im coming over. I say, ‘No D. I’m not fucking coming over.’ So I hysterically cry and just lay on the couch and watch TV. Then I looked up storage in the phonebook and wrote down a list of things i need to move… but thats not the point, I always go everywhere with him and he NEVER will do anything for me. Im getting fucking sick of that. So I went to my parents house by myself. They had set a place for him, my dad went and bought him some Newcastles… not to mention that we had seen my folks in the grocery store the weekend before and he said to my father’s face that he was going to go. Im getting all heated up again just writing about this.

On Thanksgiving my father suggested I start looking for a new car. And I did just that…. TADA!!:

2004 Jeep Liberty… Will have this week 🙂