08/26/2012

Reasons I don’t hang out, ever, with my extended family include: a 15 year old cousin who already has the DTs and sweats from alcohol abuse, and has no idea why, or why she’s always angry; a cousin two years older who’s had at least one abortion; an auntie who’s been on welfare since she was 22; and almost everyone else not included in this list is a drug or government abuser of some form, and has seen (or will see) jail time.

I have precisely two cousins who are cool, and a rad uncle who passed away a few years ago.

IN OTHER NEWS: coffee.