On Being Two Faced

I find it’s easier for me and I blame my parents. They’re divorced so I when I’m around each one individually I usually side with that person. That is bad. It happens a lot with my friends too. Friends "break up" if you will and are no longer friends but I’m still friends with both parties so I play both sides.

I must be really good at it too because as far as I can tell no one has caught on to my shadiness. 

I get a chance to do it again tonight. My best friend -well I call him my best friend for all intensive purposes, soon I’ll write about him and explain that situation because it’s a long story- any way my best friend introduced me to this guy who goes to a different school. They were friends though who knows what but long story short we became good friends. Not besties quite yet but just good friends. 

Anyway they’re not really friends any more, well this good friend with my best friend aka my best friend doesn’t really know how good friend feels about him -for purposes of this blog I should have just given them names, oh well- Ok so Best friend’s name is Tyler and good friend’s name is Jared.

Jared, from what I gather doesn’t really enjoy Tyler’s company that much lately but still talks to him now and again, and I’m hearing negative things about each person from both sides. So Jared and I have sort of been hanging out behind Tyler’s back, not really keeping it secret from him just hanging out and not inviting him. . . purposefully 🙁

I like Jared’s company, just because Tyler and his friendship became complicated doesn’t mean I should have to suffer, and I don’t like hanging out with all three of us together because I end up playing the balancer referee middle man what ever you want to call it.

So, again tonight Jared is coming down to where I go to school to spend the night. Which he’s just a good friend -and we have discussed how we both love awkward situations- but since he’s just a good friend this one on one is going to be awkward. I hope I don’t have to entertain him too much, all the while hoping that Tyler doesn’t call me -which lately chances of him initiating hang out time is unlikely.-

Ugh my life. Being unevenly yoked and living double lives and being two faced, is very unbiblical and it says something about my character. I guess you could assume that over all my personality is very fake. I think even sometimes I’m fake with myself.

I crave reality! I crave no secrets! I crave no drama! I crave normalcy.

But then I’d be bored.