I need relationship advice… note me please o.o
The Story: I met Sheldon last summer at a dance convention in Las Vegas. He was/is very funny, sweet, supportive, caring and a beautiful man who even wears his pants halfway down his ass (LOL! So GANGSTA!).
Why we are meant to be: *After the convention/competition we were forced to move back to our separate parts of the country (Me, Texas; him, Minnnesota- unbelievably 30 minutes away from where I used to live when I lived in Minnesota- VERY odd [and also freaking cold!]).
*As soon as I walked into my home from Las Vegas I received a phone call from Sheldon who had just gotten home as well. He just said, "Hi" and that was it. I melted and fell for him.
*He’s my type. Pants hanging down his ass and everything. I’ll try to find a picture. ^_^
*He’s a dancer [although not as hardcore about it as I am] yet he understands my dedication to dance.
That is the hardest quality to find in a significant other (for me).
And I found it.
*A few months ago we decided to start dating, and as far as phone dating goes… we’re in love with each other.
The Problem: Sheldon and I are both dancers and are moving out to LA to pursue careers in dance next summerish. So, wouldn’t it make sense for us to live together? We’ll both need roomates in order to survive financially.
UHHHH- I’m scared as SHIT! 
WOOT WOOT! Argh…
There’s so many things I have to think about before I actually live with someone… let alone a male I only know over the phone (I’m not a trusting person- it’s so hard for me to tell if people are lying over the phone). How do I know he’s going to hold up his end of the rent?, what about pregnancy?, what will our FAMILIES think- we’re not getting married and in a sense we barely know each other!
(Not to mention that I’m almost terrified to talk to my parents about this.)
I have to take into account that if something happens between us and he actually manages to upset me it’s going to show in my dancing that day and affect my ability to get a job (thus not paying MY end of the rent).
Then again, I also have to take into account that he will face the same aforementioned issues as I.
Also, that I will face a few of these problems no matter who my roomate is. (If I don’t room with Sheldon chances are I won’t know my roomate until I live with them- scary as well.)
But worse yet: Dance will always come before Sheldon. For example, if I get a job on the cruise lines, I will pick up my shit and leave. Be like, "BYE SHELDON! PEACE!" Nah, of course I’ll feel for him, but if I like it on the cruise lines… um… I’m not going back to him.
Males/My emotions do not rule my life. Dancing is most important to me. People have left me/dumped me/tried to kill me/scorned me/loved me/befriended me/made love to me and the only thing that I can ALWAYS count on to be there is dance.
The Question: So do I dump Sheldon now and save us some possible heartache in the future? Or do I risk my dance career and maybe even my life (who knows?) and live with the man I love?
The bigger question: How many times can I find love and let it go… and still be able to find it when I want/need it?
So many people in life search for love… and I feel horrible because I’ve found it a couple times already AND DON’T FUCKING WANT IT!
All I want to do is dance but, honestly, I don’t want to lose those I love in the process.
Doing so hurts. And it’s been done too many times.
I just don’t know what to do. Please, feel free to note anything.
Personal experiences, questions, obvious points, not-so-obvious points, "You’re-a-stupid-fuckhead-who-needs-to-get-a-life", bland comments, condolences, curses… I don’t care. I will appreciate anything.
Thanks.
-INMATE-
Wearing:: Camo pants (that actually fit) and a loose, black strap tank with a dragon emblem and Vans
Last ate:: I just ate three pieces of chicken and an ear of corn. I’m eating frozen lime yogurt. I’m concentrating on my protein intake. This morning I had 22 g, just now I had 53; total= 75. I need 25 more grams. Geez that’s a lot.
Feeling:: Happy (I just ate… that’s a dead give away right there!)
I say go ahead and chance it.
Warning Comment
Look, speaking from experience, right now YOU are more important. You do what you feel is right. Personally, I think moving in with him wouldn’t be the best idea, especially since you only have an over-the-phone relationship. I did that and now… wow. I wish I hadn’t. So, do as your heart says, and if it says dance is it, focus on that. Plenty of time for love when you’re settled. 🙂
Warning Comment
i think you should find a female roommate and he can live a few blocks away. maybe after a 6 month lease or so and you guys still wanna do it, THEN you move in together. otherwise its all too risky just knowing him over the phone.
Warning Comment
I believe in the sun,though it never brightens my day I believe in love,though it’s always gone away I believe in hapiness,though I rarely feel it I believe in the rain,because I can see the darkness from where I sit I believe in you without knowing why I believe in me though sometimes I want to die I believe in peace,though I cause the violence I believe in God,though he takes a vow of silence.
Warning Comment
i dont know what to say really.. hmm. i would go ahead with it. anything is susceptable to change! 🙂 thanks for your note!
Warning Comment
Try it out, but make sure he knows that dance comes first. Basically tell him everything under ‘but worse yet’ to ‘the question’… get the point across. In my opinion, you’ll be better off living with him then someone you’re a *complete* and utter stranger to. But then again, I’d do what you think’s best when it comes right down to it. Maybe moving in with him isn’t the best idea. >>
Warning Comment
I don’t exactly have any experience in the area, after all. Hahah, ;). Good luck, though. I’m sure it’ll work out in the end.
Warning Comment
wow, that’s quite a complicated situation there 🙂 and as you know I suck at relationships, lol. I guess just do what feels right – just make sure he knows dance comes first so you don’t accidentally create any expectations. although ya never know – if you get there with him and have fun, you may want to give up dancing 😉 just be prepared for whatever life throws at you, one way or the other!
Warning Comment
I wish I could give more advice, but I have no experience in the matter. So good luck with whatever you decide 🙂 haha and ryn: yay! I’m glad someone else has ULS (Uncontrollable Laughter Syndrome) 🙂
Warning Comment
Thanks for the note. I am going to try to keep talking to him, but I just don’t know if that’s going to be possible. I know I shouldn’t point fingers and blame people who didn’t do anything wrong. I’m horrible for that. I dono, it makes me feel better if I can blame someone. I know it’s wrong though, and no, it doesn’t help in the long run. Anyways, thanks again for the note, I appreciate it.
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LoLz…my friend got me into SIMS…it’s such an awesome game!!…though my computer doesn’t really like it. It’s still fun.. Peace…
Warning Comment
you may not know this guy as well as you would like, but its better than moving in with a total stranger, right? if things don’t work out between you and him, then that sucks. but i wouldn’t break things off beforehand just because you don’t want it to end badly. ~
Warning Comment
“So many people in life search for love… and I feel horrible because I’ve found it a couple times already AND DON’T *UCKING WANT IT!” wow…at least you know what you want and dont pretend…thats good. i say live life as you want! i once was in love and miss it each and every day…..
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