Entry 769:

I kinda feel like I’m going nowhere.
Like, yeah I’ve started hormones, and I know it’s going to take time, that’s not the thing bothering me.
It’s nothing trans* related.

I feel like I’m getting left behind.
Everyone’s moving on with themselves.
Or has plans to.
I want to move away.
Start somewhere new.
I keep feeling that I need to move forward.
But being stuck here.
Stuck in an office.
Stuck in Liverpool…
I can’t.

I half want to join the army.
I’m not fit enough, but I could be.
I could be…

Could I join the army…?

So many people would kill me.
So many people…