where does time go?

It’s been a long time since I wrote an entry. I don’t know where to begin.

My internship at the prison is finally over. After four months of working roughly 70 hours a week, I am down to only one job. I am still waitressing at a bar/restaurant and am only working between 30 and 35 hours a week. I don’t know what to do with so much free time. I guess I need to find a hobby of some sort.

I recently moved in with the guy I went on a date with in the last entry. Things have been going amazingly between us and it didn’t make sense for me to continue paying $450 a month for rent if I was spending half the week at his house. Plus it is kind of an intensified trial period. I am leaving for graduate school at the end of August and we wanted to make sure it was worth it to spend ten months in a long distance relationship. It would have been a waste of a lot of time and money to try to make it work for ten months only to move in together when I finished grad school and find out we can’t stand living together and that it wasn’t going to work. I sort of hate that I have broken everything down so logically. But…that’s me I guess. I am trying really hard to avoid the bad relationship decisions I am so great at making.

Oh right…and I graduate  from college on Saturday!  Finally!  I am really glad it is over; however I have never been one to enjoy pomp and circumstance and huge ceremonies. I would much rather just get my diploma in the mail and just get on with life. My aversion to these types of events intensified after my dad died and I have come to the conclusion that it is a subconscious thing. In my mind, my dad was supposed to be there for all the big events in my life and his absence is usually felt the most at these times. So if there is no big ceremony or to do then it can pass quietly and I can just kind of ignore that it has happened and that he missed it. Mom has already made it very clear that skipping the graduation ceremony is not an option. Which I guess is a good thing. Not liking drawn out boring ceremonies is one thing but I need to learn to be comfortable marking special occasions in my life without my dad.