No good horrible very bad day

Ugh, yesterday was awful.

First of all, I spilled my coffee all over the front of me while I was driving.

Then, one of my clients was served his deportation notice; despite the fact that he has evidence documenting that his life is in jeopardy in Hondoras. Half of his family has been stabbed to death by a gang that is angry with his cousin. They were after him for three weeks before he managed to escape to the United States. So the US government is basically sending him to his death. Fuck. you. US government.

So after a ten hour work day I drag myself to the gym. Which was probably the only good thing about yesterday.

Afterwards I am home and studying for only half an hour when I get a call from my ex asking why he can’t come visit me and going on and on about how he understands I need my space so that I can concentrate and focus on school but that he thinks we can get back together once I graduate. That he will give me all the time in the world that I need but that we were too amazing to give up on. That he will wait for me for how ever long it takes.

I want him to be happy and in order to do that he needs to move on. It was a bad conversation that involved me having to be very blunt and saying things I knew were going to hurt him. And it was awful and it ripped my heart out.

And so, I cried myself to sleep at 2am when we finally got off the phone instead of getting the studying and reading done that I needed to.

I am reading, studying, and writing papers every second I am not at my internship, the gym, or in class. And I am only sleeping 4 hours a night. How is it possible that I am just barely staying on top of all the work I have to do?