abba…

no date, but I don’t really want to focus my writing on that event (or lack thereof) so much right now.

I suck at life. Sometimes I wonder why I can’t be less awkward, more sure of myself, more flirtatious… and then I remember that in this scenario I’m actually not supposed to be more flirtatious… I’m supposed to not do anything but go with the flow. And I’m also supposed to not even dream of starting to like this kid, because he has clearly on several occasions and in several manners demonstrated that he and his girlfriend are rather serious.

Which means he sucks at life as much as I do, because talk about mixed signals 101.

And he drinks.

He’s really cool though… is always reading… plays video games, played trumpet – we’re talking true nerd. The drinking doesn’t fit at all in his personality… I hate it. I hate that he took all of these steps that could merely be for friendship, yet steps that had he not had a girlfriend while taking them would make me think he was taking steps in the first place. Am I coherent?

And he signs off without a trace. Hopefully just kicked off? Who knows. Good, back again.