a little gossip a little chat (not really though)

*sighs* Erin posted Lifehouse lyrics in her last entry… now I have it stuck in my head! Such a lovely song… it so reminds me of… *coughs* Well, err, Aims and Meg, you may fill in the blank there, as I am not at liberty to say while I’m, you know *clears throat* yeah.

I’m falling even more in love with you

Letting go of all I’ve held on to

I’m standing here until you make me move

I’m hangin by a moment here with you

*dances in her head* I love it… it’s so not played on the radio enough. I need to get that CD. OOOH I think I still have Borders money… this could work. This could really work. I’m not sure how much I have left, but I think it’s enough for a CD… *I hope*.

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I stare at glass, waiting, hoping. The rhythm of the clock takes over my senses… tick tock tick tock tick tock tick tock… There is silence, only the constant tick tock tick tock tick tock and the soft whir of the machine.

My eyes begin to dry out… they ache to close. But I force them to remain open, staring. Concentrating. Mesmerized. Closing them with my fingers for a second… soothing… opening again. They are past heaviness… they are controlled. Staring.

I feel my right hand starting to go numb. The tips of my fingers are icy from rest. I vainly attempt to warm them, but they are past warmth. Cold. Frigid.

Curtainless windows surround me. Tick tock tick tock tick tock… Only night fills them. Darkness surrounds me where I sit, except for the light in front of me. They can see me… but I cannot see them. And I sit. I’m waiting, hoping, dreaming. Sleepless.

Why do I deprive myself? I feel my body completely asleep… I am only mentally awake. And even then not quite. Yet I cannot move. My limbs will not get up. My eyes will not close, will not stop staring. Tick tock tick tock tick tock. Pounding meaninglessly into my brain… pushing all logic away. Must stay awake.

Eyes… twisting. It begins to blur… every straight line begins to bow… wavy. My head fumbles with the messages… I try to stay for just a few more minutes. What if??? I must wait. I must. Tick tock tick tock tick tock tick tock.

I submit. The soft hum ceases. The bright light gone. Darkness takes it’s place, and yet tick tock tick tock… I force my limbs to stand. I force my eyes to stumble in the dark. Softly… quietly… must not awaken them.

I tiptoe to bed. My eyes release… my muscles melt. Utter silence… fades to morning.

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So perhaps not interesting or deep, but I felt like writing SOMETHING. HAH, ironic that I should write that here?? And that I HAVE experienced, lol. GEE I wonder why. Oh well.

For now I’m being

~swept away in pre-calc~

@~>~>-dreamergrrl

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