Crying out loud.

I woke up crying out your name this morning. I dreamt that we were at the last place that I saw you alive, that I hugged you, that I kissed you. Then I  was holding your dead body, but you were telling me to let go. I still do not know how, I still cry out loud. I did not want to open my eyes to the realization that I am still alive, and you are not. I do not want to let go.