Purgatory

Today my first born baby starts 2nd grade. Where does the time go? She was just so small in my arms and now I couldn’t even carry her more than a few steps.. life is so fleeting. I wish her well this year and today.. and really for the rest of her life. Such a bittersweet moment watching them grow literally right out of your arms.

Speaking of fleeting. Happiness.
Why is happiness so here and so there? Why is it so temporary? Why are we so hyper fixated as human on our search for it? I know I am. Any moment that’s lacking it for me feels like one giant chase. Though, happiness just like any and every other emotion we feel is temporary. It is fleeting. Here one moment gone the next. I’m not really sure any emotion is ever permanent except sadness in the presence of happiness’s absence. Which seems to be more often than not. A friend of mine said maybe we have to struggle to appreciate the good..

Maybe she’s right… or- maybe we have to hurt to know what we lost and what we could’ve done differently. Maybe that’s my lesson- maybe that’s my purgatory. All I know is, purgatory burns like hell.