Happy Birthday to me!!

Well, obviously, it’s my birthday. I turn 23 today. Poulas is driving down from Ohio (I’m in Kentucky)… I’m excited for that!! I’ve been in Kentucky since the 25th. Was contemplating moving here, but so far, no job opportunities have presented themselves, so I’m not sure what’s going to happen. I met a guy in Sioux City… UGH. It’s frustrating since I might be leaving there. His name is Will. I’ve known him for a long time (since high school)… and he keeps reappearing in my life. I’m not sure what’s going on. He said if I wasn’t leaving he would ask me out. Well, now he might get the chance, because I’m not sure I’m going to be able to move here. I know I should be excited, but I’m just confused. I’m not sure what I want anymore. And I absolutely HATE that feeling. Poulas seems to be getting farther and farther away. Last night he was testy with me about when he was going to drive down here. The one thing I wanted was to be able to spend my birthday with him and my brother and sister in law. Now, I get that chance. But, he was really testy last night. Yelling at me that he didn’t know when he would be coming down, that he’d get here when he got here.. blah blah. Kinda pissed me off. It was a simple question that could have been answered simply. So, I don’t know. He called a bit ago and said he was leaving soon to come here. So, we shall see him in a hour or so I hope. 🙂 Ended up crying a bit last night. I’m just frustrated with no job and I hate sitting around doing nothing. I really want to work. But, it’s so hard to find a job anymore. Hopefully after the new year something will open up. One can only hope I suppose. So, I might talk to my old boss at the gas station and see if I can at least get SOME hours in so I’m not freakin’ out about how I’m going to pay for my car and keep my car insurance and stuff. I have to pay my school loan here tomorrow, but that won’t get done until like the 4th or something. I fly back to Iowa on the 3rd. My parents are trying to get me to stay until the 8th, but I’m ready to go back and start working or something, if I can get my job back at the gas station. I need to do something or else I’m going to go crazier than I already am!! So, we shall see. I’m hoping to hear something by Monday from my sister’s work… *crosses fingers*

Haven’t talked to Will in a couple days. He kinda pisses me off at times. He’s horrible about calling back. Oh well. Such is life, and such is my luck. Nothing’s changed in that department. Maybe 2006 will be my year, ’cause obviously 2005 hasn’t been!! It’s been one of the most awful years of my life… Jason and I broke up, Car accident, relationships going sour, friendships going sour, Charlie dying, Poulas attempting to commit suicide, etc. I hope next year is alot better.

Anyways, that’s all for now. Hopefully Poulas should be here soon… that’d make my day/night ALOT better! Happy New Year all!! Keep in touch!

Alissa