Question ~||:EDIT:||~

So frustrated.

To whom does the sex belong to in a relationship? 

The man?

The woman?

Or both?

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Clarification: In a relationship what is the healthy stance on whom is to innitiate it/have power over sex? 

Does one person constantly have this role/control or is this more an "off the cuff" / impromptu happenstance?

If I haven’t elaborated prior my situation is one where it is entirely skewed and not in my favor.

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January 13, 2010

Both. It has to be a mutual and giving thing. Sometimes you might not exactly be feeling like sex but youre partner is and i’ve found that if you just give in you end up having an enjoyable time.

January 13, 2010

Agreed. Both.

January 13, 2010

Both is the closest answer, although I’m not sure it “belongs to” anyone.

what do you mean ‘belong’…..?

January 14, 2010

I am not able to make sense of this question.

January 14, 2010

I’m not sure I understand what you mean by “belong”…elaborate, please 😀

January 14, 2010

Hmmm. I think I need clarification. Before I give some answer that makes ZERO sense.

January 14, 2010

God,I hope that one person doesn’t have the power. Sex should be about both individuals, not one over the other or calling all the shots.

both should initiate; both should have the decision to decline and both should understand that refusal. now, no world is perfect but there should be lots of talking in either circumstance i would think…

Him
January 14, 2010

There’s no real discussion, just my acceptance of her decision. It’s never the right time ever.

Lor
January 14, 2010

There isn’t a right and a wrong answer here. It is a matter of compatibility. There are people out there that don’t like to have sex very often. Those people should find OTHER people with their same appetites to be in relationships with. Likewise, some people are submissive and don’t want to initiate… those people should find people who are dominant and want to take the reins all the time to bein relationships. It sounds like you want someone who is equally as interested in sex as you are and is willing and wanting to initiate as often as you are. This is reasonable, but does not sound like you have found someone like this to be in a relationship with. Unfortunately, you can’t MAKE someone have the same libido as yours… But, if the relationship is important to the both of you, perhaps counselling can help even the weight on both sides.