I’ve Chosen

Dear Diary,

I know, it’s been a while. I’ve been so busy though. The important thing is, is that I’ve been busy with a truly amazing person. As you recall from my previous entry, I had a decision to make. The ex or the manager. I chose the manager. The ex, well it turned out all he wanted was a physical thing and as you know, that isn’t me. I will not allow myself to be used in that way. He should have known that. Especially from my past. I also did a lot of thinking about the ex and whether or not I truly wanted to go down that road again. I thought about our relationship and, well, I realized he was a bit selfish and pushy. I had opened up to him completely about everything, and yet, he was insistent on having sex right away, which I did not want. For me, sex does NOT come easy. I have to trust the person completely, which is no easy feat for me. Anyway, I’ve decided to say bye bye to the ex for good. No friendship even because he wanted the friends with benefits thing, and duh, NO! Anyway, the manager is much more of a gentleman. We went on our first official date on April 23rd. We went and saw Pet Sematary. He isn’t one for scary movies, but I thought it was sweet that he’d want to go see that with me. During the movie, there was this particularly intense scene (not really scary), but I could feel his grip on my arm tighten like he was a little scared. After the scene ended, I leaned over and whispered in his ear if he was okay? Well, he looked at me, smiled, said he was now, and kissed me for the first time. To me, it was perfect! I was not expecting that at all, but oh boy, did I forget about the rest of the movie. After the movie, we took a stroll under the stars and talked more. I almost opened up about everything, but I don’t want to scare him off. I feel like I have to get to know him a little more. Things have heated up since then though. We’ve been on 2 more dates since then. Date #4 is coming up this Wednesday. 

Oh, Diary, I could talk about him forever. I really could. He is just too damn wonderful. He makes me feel like I am beautiful and worthy. Looking back at all of my previous relationships, I have NEVER felt those things. He tells me I’m beautiful every day. I am just like, where in the world did this guy come from? And do I even deserve him? 

All I know, is that I am happy right now, Diary. It’s been quite some time since I’ve been this genuinely happy. He puts a smile in my face and the butterflies in the tummy. I feel like I am walking on air. Did I mention that my cat likes him as well? If the cat likes him, then that’s a major plus!

Okay, no more gushing. So, I’ve been watching a show on Netflix that I am loving. It’s called Santa Clarita Diet. I am bummed that it’s been cancelled. I think it’s hilarious! I really like the characters. They are so damn funny and play well off of one another. Why do the good shows get cancelled? Grr!

Well, that is all for now, Diary. I will be back soon to update. Have a good evening!

Your Friend,

That Girl