Poison

I managed to reduce smoking in a very satisfactory way, as well as to keep calories intake at a low level. Well, you need to know that I used to smoke about 30 – 40 cigarettes a day (I know, shame on me) and now I manage to smoke about 9 – 10. I think that behind every addiction problem and behind every exaggeration there is a lack of something, and Doctor Livio agrees with me. Anyway, I have not spoken to him this week, and I still need to ponder how to face a reduction to zero cigarettes. At the present time, I need to smoke a cigarette sometimes not really because I like it, but because I need the poison. The nicotine. I think I can consider myself lucky for the fact that I do not enjoy the cigarette that much, on the contrary, I almost consider it nasty. If there was another way to get the poison, I would use it. Well, there are many alternative ways to get the poison, without the need to smoke it. I could use nicotine plasters, for instance. That could be a great help. But I need to speak with Doctor Livio, because of my medication.

To distract myself, I suppose I need to draw something now.