Paolo’s Odyssey

As I said in my previous entry, I have shocking news about my dear friend Paolo. He is literally held prisoner in the therapeutic community where he landed. But let’s start from the beginning. 

A couple of days ago, I sent him a parcel. It contained cigarettes, Caotina, instant coffee, shower soap, and two ten-franc-rechargings for his mobile phone. As he got the parcel, the educator forced Paolo to open it in his presence. Ok. That’s understandable. Maybe it could contain drugs, alcohol, weapons, whatever. As the educator saw the cigarettes, he confiscated them. He said that Paolo was going to get one packet a day, and that the packet, which has a value of 8 francs, was being deducted from his daily pocket money. Now I ask myself, are those people insane or just sadistic? Paolo has a pocket money of ten francs a day. It was decided so by his guardian, since he would spend a lot of money to make expensive gifts to a prostitute he had fallen in love with. This was fourteen years ago. The cigarettes are a gift. Exactly life the Caotina and the coffee. Do they want to confiscate it too and deduce from his pocket money? Moreover, Caotina has to be poured into warm or cold milk, and it gives a chocolate flavored drink. The educator said that he won’t give Paolo the milk. They deny him even a glass of milk. But I don’t surrender that easily. I’m sending him powdered milk. And instant cappuccino. Luckily, the educator did not look at the card I sent along with the parcel, because otherwise he would have found the rechargings for the mobile phone. Anyway, as I called Paolo on that evening, it was on Thursday, he was desperate. He said that he feels humiliated and deprived of his dignity. As if he were in prison. I understand him and sympathize with him. And that’s not the end of the story. 

On Friday, I got a phone call at 8 am. Paolo. I asked myself how it could be possible that Paolo was calling me at that time, since they confiscate his mobile phone from 7 am until 7 pm. I called back, but he didn’t answer. So I thought that it was the day of his dentist’s appointment, even if I was sure this was on Monday. "Never mind", I thought, "I must be wrong.". I called him as usual at 8.30 pm, and he said to me, "Today I ran away". I was speechless. "You what?". "I ran away.". Really. After breakfast, Paolo, with no money and no bus and tram ticket, went to town, I don’t know exactly how – fortunately enough he knows all bus drivers and they let him travel without ticket – and knocked at the door of his guardian’s boss. With no appointment, only with his desperation. He told him what was happening, but those people are not really empathetic. They found the way to bring him to the therapeutic community again, but yesterday there was a meeting at The Castle with Paolo, his guardian, his doctor, and the assistant of the vice-head-physician. 

This meeting turned out to be a farce. Paolo is very emotional, sadly he is not really in the position to stick up for himself. And sadly I am not a relative of him, so that I can’t do anything else than supporting him emotionally. I wanted to talk to his daughter, but she is on holiday in South Italy with her boyfriend and it is not possible to reach her at the moment. The situation is quite serious; this is one of those moments in which I wish I had finished my studies and were a lawyer. Never mind. It was not meant to be. Anyway, the meeting. Paolo said, once again, that ten francs pocket money a day is too less, and at least they could not deduce the cigarettes from his pocket money. Now, as I said above, he gets a packet of cigarettes and two francs a day. Guess what his doctor said? He said, "Well, that’s a lot, you don’t need more!". This is what I would call making fun of someone, mocking him and abusing him. 

At the end of the meeting, the Paolo’s guardian gave him a lift to the therapeutic community, and they spoke with the educator for a while. Oh, the educator did nothing else than praising Paolo, claiming that he is such a hard worker, such an obeying person, such a pleasant guest. 

I suppose that I don’t know everything about Paolo’s past. He was a drug addict. Cocaine. He stole 6000 francs from his mother to buy cocaine. She did not report him to the Police, so that he has a clean record. I know that he is manic. He has manic episodes, no depression though; he is not bipolar. I guess giving him a flat is not possible at the moment. I don’t know behind-the-scenes activity. Paolo is a very naive and childish person, maybe if he were left alone he would neglect himself and his flat would look like a pigsty within a couple of weeks? Can he clean, cook, wash his clothes, open and sort out his mail, pay his bills… and maybe manage to have a 50% job in a protected atelier? The last time he had a flat, he was living with his ex wife. She is a chronic depressive, one of those people who just lay on the couch the whole day staring at the wall, and refuse to be cured. She should have had treatment for her depression years ago, but she never saw a psychiatric hospital from the inside and actually ruined also Paolo’s life, and the one of their daughter. Their daughter, Lauri, made a very good impression on me. I saw her once at The Castle. Anyway, Paolo has not been living alone – let’s say, independently – ever since. I think that the guardian, the educator and the doctor are playing for time, hoping either that Paolo gets accustomed to living in that community or that they can find another place for him in a similar structure. 

In spite of all this, I am shocked that people who would need to be helped and taken care of are treated like dregs of society, and deprived of their dignity in the way Paolo is deprived of his. I try to give him hope and courage, I try to cheer him up, but such situations make my blood boil. It would be of no use if I told him that he is being abused (which would be the truth, by the way) because this would only fuel his frustration… I just say, "Paolo, be patient, don’t give up.". Never give up.