Dating Nightmare

I should write a dating nightmare book

I feel like I have dated everyone in Sydney. Well everyone that is "stocky" – no skinny boys for me.

In the last 6 months I have been on Nightmare date after Nightmare date – I have told the same stories, I have been Charming, Witty, funny, mysterious, I have been myself, I have been not myself, I have let them talk, I have asked them questions. I Have flirted, I have paid for meals, I have laughed at there lame ass jokes, I have kissed them.

Song: Peter Gabriel In your eye http://www.youtube.com/watch

The Last three have been more like I thought I was being flamed for some practical joke show

Guy one) Told me that he owned a fetish website and also was part of gang ( he was reformed)

Guy Two) After telling me he was 6’1, and was an investment banker.. turned up he was 5’7 and a bank teller. He also took me to a nice restaurant but wore ripped jeans and an old tee shirt. Meanwhile I was dressed up. Also he was so boring, I swear I don’t think he had ever been on a date before.

Guy Three) after talking to me on the phone only, his conversations grew stranger and stranger. He stared to use punctuation my name as if it was punctuation. "Hi Claire, how are you Claire. I hope you had a great day Claire. What are you plans tonight Claire?" it was like he was obsessed with my name. He also started to send me photos of what he was cooking over text message. "again we had never met"

I am starting to think I am Jinxed…..

Before the last three dates in the last 18 months there was the guy who was on the dating website, but was married and had kids. It was only after I did more digging did I find out the truth. There was the guy who was gay, and wasn’t sure if he 100% was or not. But he was so CAMP, and so sweet that I had to point it out to him.  There was guy who had a kid, who was 10, yet couldn’t afford to pay for one meal we had together, I had 5 dates with him before broke it off. There was the guy who would never have a date on a Friday or Saturday night. And told me it’s because he wanted to have that to get drunk with his friends and not have a girlfriend. And then there was a guy who took out for a date on Friday, only for me to see him out the next day, on another date feeding the girl the same lines.  There was the guy who talked to me over the phone for 2 weeks, only to tell me he had met someone else 2 hours before our date. There was the guy who took me on a date and invited me back to his place, when I told him I wanted to get to know him he called me the next day and said we didn’t have much in common, only for him to then booty call me for the next 5 weeks? Each time I gave him  the same answer  There was the guy who I kissed after one very drunkin night, and perhaps did a little more,  he was married and asked if we could keep seeing each other on the side, I SAID NO of course.  There was the guy who took of his wedding ring IN FRONT OF ME.

And of course.. Troy, who was my friend and played into my weakness… He was that guy.. The friend 

Needless to say I told myseld that I wouldn’t sleep with anyone unless, I was sure my heart would handle it. 

Do you want to know the worst thing about all above about all those guys.  I don’t remember one of them.. Asking me any questions… Not one.  Of course Troy knew me, but his was worst, because he let me talk about Myself to him. I’m so stupid.

Where is my "Lloyd Dobler, with a boom box outside my window playing Peter Gabriel’s In your Eyes’"